remember vera wang?
i'm considering a project where i take the lyrics from the wall and reinterpret the lyrics using whatever tickles my fancy.
my guess is most of the jokes will be far too inside to realize humor, but for some.....they might get hit and take first. they'll be pitched fast! oooooh, stingey.
20051220
20051209
20051207
virtual frosty
so maybe you know i worked at an ad agency...it was good times, bad job, good people. i left that job to go back to school.
anyway, i keep in touch with a mess of em, and they got this little funness out now.
You put the head, torso and legs together and make combos. sometimes they dance. my fave (so far) is the leather snow daddy. Head is found 1 page down, on the left, in the middle; torso and legs are the same, respectively.
anyway, i keep in touch with a mess of em, and they got this little funness out now.
You put the head, torso and legs together and make combos. sometimes they dance. my fave (so far) is the leather snow daddy. Head is found 1 page down, on the left, in the middle; torso and legs are the same, respectively.
20051202
20051128
India [Hiatus]
I got back from India today with the dr.
An excellent adventure, complete with stomach woes.
Tales of Orchha Foot, Western Shit Road, Jahnsi (both the new imaginary {for now} camel and the filthiest train station i have ever witnessed), Mansenor Ass, Taj Mahal [biggest mausoleum ever!], delhi belly, old delhi (a whole street dedicated to paper! or an entire street of silver merchants! or spices!), the largest mosque in the world (so i'm told), and enough forts and palaces to make solomon blush.
and for Uncle Anus these are all random ponderings, musings, and tales of my trip. hot pics to come later!
but i gotta sleep and get these pics off my disk(s). J of JnJ, I'm gonna have some good entries for your 41st year contest....and study for finals.
i almost just posted "I'll be back" but I decided to spare you. and me, really.
An excellent adventure, complete with stomach woes.
Tales of Orchha Foot, Western Shit Road, Jahnsi (both the new imaginary {for now} camel and the filthiest train station i have ever witnessed), Mansenor Ass, Taj Mahal [biggest mausoleum ever!], delhi belly, old delhi (a whole street dedicated to paper! or an entire street of silver merchants! or spices!), the largest mosque in the world (so i'm told), and enough forts and palaces to make solomon blush.
and for Uncle Anus these are all random ponderings, musings, and tales of my trip. hot pics to come later!
but i gotta sleep and get these pics off my disk(s). J of JnJ, I'm gonna have some good entries for your 41st year contest....and study for finals.
i almost just posted "I'll be back" but I decided to spare you. and me, really.
20051111
it's only a model
Leanna Ortiz writes:
Take just a candy and become ready for 36 hours of love
Who can pass up an offer like that?
Take just a candy and become ready for 36 hours of love
Who can pass up an offer like that?
20051109
20051107
a few jems
20051031
daily harm
The man sat at the bar. He was not waiting for anyone, no one was waiting for him. The bartender asked him no questions, the only thing the man asked for all night was matches for his cigars, and his particular poison, cranberry and vodka.
The drink was funny to the man; he, as a younger man, repeatedly swore that he would never drink a cranberry and vodka, his reason being that if he had ever had it, he would like it too much and drink too much, causing unwanted regurgitation. That reasoning was left over from his college days when his drinking had been much heavier, not that he didn’t like to drink now, but it was a different kind of drinking. His reason being that he liked cranberry juice too much, he actually used it as a hangover relief – cold, crisp and full of vitamin C. so he figured that if he drank too much of it, the mere idea of cranberry juice might nauseate him.
But, like so many of his personal rules, he broke his promise to himself, and, like he figured, he loved it. But he had yet to drink too much of it, and the cigars were lovely. So he drank, and smoked, and drank and smoked, and thought of increasingly sillier things.
Things like the idea he had for a short story, a story of gross misunderstanding, a story about a society that fears change, and throughout the whole story the inhabitants of this civilization are all scared to let on that although this is this overwhelming fear of change, they all secretly loved change. They all secretly craved change, and the big payoff of the story was that all this hidden change bursts loose upon the streets directly after a gigantic earthquake. He hadn’t quite figured out what happened to the culture after the change pours forth into the streets, but he knew it was the downfall of that society. He wanted to work into the story: them rebuilding a society where they openly love change and now the inhabitants all despise those little paper coin rollers. A time of change, perhaps, is the title?
Of course, this story is much m ore amusing to a man who is making it up, and consuming cran n’ voddies and smoking hearty Cuban seed cigars.
The drink was funny to the man; he, as a younger man, repeatedly swore that he would never drink a cranberry and vodka, his reason being that if he had ever had it, he would like it too much and drink too much, causing unwanted regurgitation. That reasoning was left over from his college days when his drinking had been much heavier, not that he didn’t like to drink now, but it was a different kind of drinking. His reason being that he liked cranberry juice too much, he actually used it as a hangover relief – cold, crisp and full of vitamin C. so he figured that if he drank too much of it, the mere idea of cranberry juice might nauseate him.
But, like so many of his personal rules, he broke his promise to himself, and, like he figured, he loved it. But he had yet to drink too much of it, and the cigars were lovely. So he drank, and smoked, and drank and smoked, and thought of increasingly sillier things.
Things like the idea he had for a short story, a story of gross misunderstanding, a story about a society that fears change, and throughout the whole story the inhabitants of this civilization are all scared to let on that although this is this overwhelming fear of change, they all secretly loved change. They all secretly craved change, and the big payoff of the story was that all this hidden change bursts loose upon the streets directly after a gigantic earthquake. He hadn’t quite figured out what happened to the culture after the change pours forth into the streets, but he knew it was the downfall of that society. He wanted to work into the story: them rebuilding a society where they openly love change and now the inhabitants all despise those little paper coin rollers. A time of change, perhaps, is the title?
Of course, this story is much m ore amusing to a man who is making it up, and consuming cran n’ voddies and smoking hearty Cuban seed cigars.
20051028
chupple mcspam
and now for some brilliant spam, if only it was all like this:
hospital lonely lost affect sight. line understand story has hurry argue wished your progress three. sad appeared allow over books longer surprise, anybody sugar passed work front dinner! duty hear progress thankyou lord,
planning instead sent force at studying, fasten laid season in dead
separate development food, best fine leaving surely commit buy knows
poison middle" drink planning example allowed acquaint recommend them exactly small wont" regular secretary college height. knowledge expected whatever studying company woman giving perform interesting.
moon wanted recess grammar interest tongue. for suddenly blow than. sitting forest difficult grow, handsome nature lesson gotten! whose again now wrong sound, deep exclaimed chapter husband mentioned!
telling trust may occurrence countenance first college gone luckily work" win break yours above boys,
i love you.
20051021
chupple mcswing (part III)
Three minutes later, three men, in suits, walked into the bar. They were hit men. The man that they were looking for was sitting at the bar, in front of an empty glass. The bartender looked at the hit men entering and muscled, in a grunt, toward his only patron, “That’s it McSwing, you’re done”.
McSwing looked in the mirror behind the bar and analyzed the three poppers. Then he fell off his stool, feigning a drunken stupor, and groped around on the floor for a while, while the three men grinned at each other.
None of the three killers saw it coming. The bartender had heard about it, but that night he saw it. While on the floor, sliding his way through the spilt beer, cigar ash and empty packs of cigarettes, McSwing removed the skin from his right arm. “It wasn’t really an arm, after all!” the bartender would tell his boss, Jack, later. It was an extremely modified sawed-off ten-gauge shotgun. McSwing racked the weapon, and slammed it home.
McSwing looked in the mirror behind the bar and analyzed the three poppers. Then he fell off his stool, feigning a drunken stupor, and groped around on the floor for a while, while the three men grinned at each other.
None of the three killers saw it coming. The bartender had heard about it, but that night he saw it. While on the floor, sliding his way through the spilt beer, cigar ash and empty packs of cigarettes, McSwing removed the skin from his right arm. “It wasn’t really an arm, after all!” the bartender would tell his boss, Jack, later. It was an extremely modified sawed-off ten-gauge shotgun. McSwing racked the weapon, and slammed it home.
The last thing that the biggest man heard was the dreaded “chick-chook” of the round being chambered. Then the roar. The other two took heavy damage from the initial blast. One, named Chuck, understood what was happening as soon as he saw the big man go down. Chuck reached for his piece, a trusty Desert Eagle .45, which always reminded him of his father, Java Joe. But Chuck’s attempt to reach for his weapon was interrupted by a sudden realization that Chuck’s right arm no longer existed. Chuck knew that was bad news for him, and he also knew what was next, him. He was right on the former, but slightly incorrect on the latter, if only for a moment, and during that moment before the third roar from the surprise cannon, Chuck thought of his father. He remembered seeing his father in the hospital, on his deathbed, dying of stomach cancer.
20051020
If this is a dream, i'm glad you're having it with me.
Someday, When we are all dead
Someday,
When we are all dead
We’ll think back to the thoughts
And the ant, or the mutant spaceship
Can equally experience the doubts
The significance of being naked.
Which all should know
Has been forgotten
Inside our heads.
Replaced, most effectively with toxins
Mostly shit we made to perfection.
The truth of our moments
The experience of our orgasm
How are you doin this mornin?
[{(Fuck)}]
20051017
chupple this.
Tape, Mind, Smell, Scrambled &
Of dances, and towers, and time on tape
Of catchy little numbers, so tiny you can’t see
Of insidious little creatures screaming inside of your mind.
But this is no video
This.
Your catchy jazz numbers.
Your sweet luscious sweat smell.
Why the romance of these little people
Of which it’s so scrambled.
At least there is something
I HEAR THEM MUMBLE
20051014
chuppling poet
Inches or Miles
We missed you that first time by inches or miles.
We’ll never know.
We are unable to contact you.
Please call immediately.
Our actions can be unnerving.
Our attitudes shock many.
We make it slow.
We’ll take your items.
We thought you were ideal.
Your experience has flown free, inside our soul.
We are scarred, and scared, but heal with your inches and miles.
Come on up to the house.
We missed you that first time by inches or miles.
We’ll never know.
We are unable to contact you.
Please call immediately.
Our actions can be unnerving.
Our attitudes shock many.
We make it slow.
We’ll take your items.
We thought you were ideal.
Your experience has flown free, inside our soul.
We are scarred, and scared, but heal with your inches and miles.
Come on up to the house.
20051013
mystery shopping
so i got a mystery shop today.
i can't decide if it is completely against my morals or not.
mystery shopping, on the one hand, tis cool - i get to check out places i normally wouldn't go, and usually to places i haven't been before (Daly City [Daily - Shitty], for instance, today). It's also interesting to know which companies like to have this done. Tells you they are expecting a certain standard for their employees. I think I like that.
But (he bolded) the majority of the shops are not used to make sure that shoppers are getting excellent service at their local pizza joint. The majority are designed to reward (or punish) the employees at the local pizza joint, or movie theater, or amusement park, where the customer is to be UPSOLD. "Ok, sir, that's a pepperoni pizza slice, and small coke and a churro. Would you like to upsize that coke to a large? [does anyone remember the slogan that burker king [or was it mcdonalds?] used to make the meal sides (fries, rings, the drink) Ginormous, "GO LARGE!" {america follows - "Make me fat!" they screamed.
})
ok, sidebar over, anyway, so I'm having a hard time with it.
IN fact, I wrote this post in draft on August 23. I've since quit since then, for a variety of reasons (hate it, they don't pay enough for the trouble, they pay slow, not to mention the moral annoyance).
i can't decide if it is completely against my morals or not.
mystery shopping, on the one hand, tis cool - i get to check out places i normally wouldn't go, and usually to places i haven't been before (Daly City [Daily - Shitty], for instance, today). It's also interesting to know which companies like to have this done. Tells you they are expecting a certain standard for their employees. I think I like that.
But (he bolded) the majority of the shops are not used to make sure that shoppers are getting excellent service at their local pizza joint. The majority are designed to reward (or punish) the employees at the local pizza joint, or movie theater, or amusement park, where the customer is to be UPSOLD. "Ok, sir, that's a pepperoni pizza slice, and small coke and a churro. Would you like to upsize that coke to a large? [does anyone remember the slogan that burker king [or was it mcdonalds?] used to make the meal sides (fries, rings, the drink) Ginormous, "GO LARGE!" {america follows - "Make me fat!" they screamed.
})ok, sidebar over, anyway, so I'm having a hard time with it.
IN fact, I wrote this post in draft on August 23. I've since quit since then, for a variety of reasons (hate it, they don't pay enough for the trouble, they pay slow, not to mention the moral annoyance).
20050930
i mean damn
luther wright.
what a guy.
he's got this band, 'the wrongs'.
yeah, luther wright and the wrongs. they are the the guys that did the improbable. here's a review -
"Luther Wright and the Wrongs pull off the improbable. Where the original floated on some distant, emotionally wrought plain, the Wrongs rump and whump, making you want to grab your girl and two-step. Far from sounding nostalgic, the music feels urgent."- New York Times June 30, 2002
so they did that. and i was, you know, googling the guy to see what else was out there, as you do.
currently there is this song that i can't seem to hear enough of. It's called 'hurtin fer certain'. on the album of the same name.
i got this download from his website, but as of now, (java is cooler) that appears to be crashed out.
point is, the song just bounces gleefully, with lyrics like:
'all the words that we said, lie stone cold somewhere defeated...
i sleep a-lone, and all i ever dream of, is a farm and a field of green bud'
so i ordered the damn thing. can't much remember what music i bought last, full price. damn thing has gotta come from canadia so i get in 3 weeks or so.
what a guy.
he's got this band, 'the wrongs'.
yeah, luther wright and the wrongs. they are the the guys that did the improbable. here's a review -
"Luther Wright and the Wrongs pull off the improbable. Where the original floated on some distant, emotionally wrought plain, the Wrongs rump and whump, making you want to grab your girl and two-step. Far from sounding nostalgic, the music feels urgent."- New York Times June 30, 2002
so they did that. and i was, you know, googling the guy to see what else was out there, as you do.
currently there is this song that i can't seem to hear enough of. It's called 'hurtin fer certain'. on the album of the same name.
i got this download from his website, but as of now, (java is cooler) that appears to be crashed out.
point is, the song just bounces gleefully, with lyrics like:
'all the words that we said, lie stone cold somewhere defeated...
i sleep a-lone, and all i ever dream of, is a farm and a field of green bud'
so i ordered the damn thing. can't much remember what music i bought last, full price. damn thing has gotta come from canadia so i get in 3 weeks or so.
20050923
20050921
Grover, don't lose faith!
I got two tickets from DPT today, just now.
8/10 & 8/17.
2400 block of laguna st, pac heights!
with that bad clutch! wow, i am impressed with that thief!
going to check it out (teh area) shortly.
so much for DPT communicating to the SFPD and vice versa.
what do i do if it's found? sheesh!
more news soon!
[what the hell am i talking about? - this this & this]
8/10 & 8/17.
2400 block of laguna st, pac heights!
with that bad clutch! wow, i am impressed with that thief!
going to check it out (teh area) shortly.
so much for DPT communicating to the SFPD and vice versa.
what do i do if it's found? sheesh!
more news soon!
[what the hell am i talking about? - this this & this]
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