guess what?

this is not the SF-ist...

holy retinal burn.

nazi pope?

So the Pope made some jackass remarks without consulting:
a) history books
b) 1.5 (or so) Billion Muslims
c) any kind of political advisor

All of whom might have asked him to rethink reciting from a Byzantine Emperor. Yes, that link is to the time of the fall of the Byzantine Empire...Right from when the quote ol' Benedict used. I'm no fortuneteller, though.

This Benedict guy is a jackass. So much for a Christian attitude, huh buddy?

Anyway, i was looking around for things related, like a good blogger, and ran into this. Jeezie Creezie! Reminds me when I lived with the Satanist in Sausalito. Which, mind you, could be an awesome band name. Left hand path, gangway! He sho was a nice fella, tho.

MUNI

one part of this:
6 year old kid: "Why don't they trip when we get in the back door?"
20ish acquaintance: 'They don't care none, they still getting paid. Would you trip?"
6 year old kid: "Not if I get paid."
-- From Mark/On the 15

one part this, this and that.

this works well for laughs.

So why can't SF get it's collective ass together to use already built technologies and proven transit methods to provide inexpensive, yet effective public transport?

Beats the hell outta me. I'm just trying to keep my street litter free. Compound these errors!

dead news?

I really enjoyed this column, and here's what grabbed me:

In honor of George W. Bush's efforts to stop torture by setting up secret CIA prisons and promote freedom by expanding government surveillance powers, I think we should spend a few days contemplating another great thing this administration has done for the world: it has reinvigorated political satire.

I think my question to the Dub (remember that chupplers?) would have to involve this somehow...but i fear my question going where any q goes that doesn't involve the current taste in his mouth, or how much brush to clear at his ranch; straight into his confused "stay the course" bin.

i keep

on reading and re-reading this article, and am not sure what to even think.

I guess as Tony Snow says "It's nothing new".

I'm gonna get that guy some Wellies for his birthday. I just think he deserves some. For all the sheep. You see where I'm going?

the (unavoidable) ramp up to

the 9/11 hoora.

Closing my eyes and plugging my ears whilst humming the tune to John Vanderslice's Exodus Damage won't prevent the voracious amount of 5 year anniversary "war on terra" hooha that is planned on being released in the next week or so. I just hope the media sources can wait until after Labor Day to launch their onslaught, so I can get a few good naps in.

Anyway, as a pre-strike on some (alleged Conservative) documentary that is going to be played on a channel near your head, this column came out, and it pointed out some very interesting and relevant information to me, and now, to you, a consumer.

free business idea.

everythingposthumous.com

truly a fabulous idea...but how does one measure spectral activity? Statcounter, can you do this?

Please leave comments on what would be sold there.

I push the (S)P(r)am Alot!

Not only is this just an amazing spam, it's also a great tag line!
And when I'm bored I can think of all the wonderful things "botnets attacked Defense school district Seattle hospital being arrested" {text as i received it}:

entered. provides about selected zodiac signs. Now gives meaning wellYour Name:Your get score up
endured activists tried firebomb
quite few newcomers industry pay hire away reports. led
service keep varied fresh. Man Years Botnet Weeks NANOG argued whether botnet command endeavor LA Times old fashioned arresting criminals still works. conspired create botnets attacked Defense school district Seattle hospital being arrested. plead guilty sentenced Textbooks Here cf Talk student price
Duran founder chief area Cape Perpetua central coast gigantic crab fish according Christian Monitor OSU closeup coastal dead zone. things worse. weeks ago measured level dissolved oxygen ocean. levels times normal down hypoxia. theyre total absence anoxia. details pictures Climate gollum BBC study Europes climate. collated nations studies involving species. results indicate coming earlier beginning average six eight did said. regions Spain saw increases season began earlier. findings described worlds largest
left Molotov cocktail elderly neighbors doorstep. email animal groups saying win... dont bother my Companies Stick Voice Menus Ask Teaching Primary School Students Hardware: Iranian NYT heavy water nuke goes today. produces went operation U.N. demands Tehran stop activity develop nuclear bomb. President Mahmoud peaceful purposes. comes Thursdays deadline uranium weapons economic political reporting launch Sunday. engineers powerful lightning strikes
lowest common hit crotch. Consider Best Kids Animals DVD: kid doing onto dads groin baby running church pew dog peeing wedding clocking nuts helmet. While these clips certainly lowbrow got something else common: Theyre oozing family comments Struggle Wikipedia dept.A mention Herald Tribune troubles faces getting underway. there interest primary obstacle exposure: majority people continent Africa not internet access. What when literacy rates among languages speakers approach
against Crypto announced allows attacker choose colliding messages. possible example produce two HTML documents nonsense after closing lt/htmlgt tag despite slight thanks adapted appendage same hash value. MD
years math focus group theory impact. Joe Areas Expertise assorted set lists data odd pieces data. Great reading bathroom plane riders Peter Wayners Write Portable Code does excellent job write code multiple variant systems. Simon P. Chappells easy please first Slashdots book Updated: hemos Older August Dodging CropsThe Reporting Apple Faraday Cages Tame State Logs Microsoft OutNovell Launches Trends Oak Ridge Lab Doubles fde Its SpaceHD Should Wired NowFriday Using Laptop
Bob Saget Slate makes pretty argument YouTube knockoffs trace their roots back Americas Funniest Home Videos. article: shows stock was lowest common hit crotch. Consider Best Kids Animals DVD: kid doing onto

a great quote

"What we have now is a terrorism industry, and the bureaucracy to support it. People are profiting from fear. Politicians cannot downplay terrorism, or they'll be voted out of office. Bush has completely run with it. And the media? If it bleeds, it reads. "

found




And these pretzel bits - Damn good in a really, really wrong way.








I only wish I understood how these two are connected. Some things are beyond the scope.

i just like it

via my bulk mail:
Fifth Third Bank - Important Fraud AIert

i wish i was still getting good spam. always fun. this is not an invitation...

from breehn

Just found this link to a Blog entitled, "They should have just called it Dr. Tran." Apparently
there is a new Will Ferrell movie about a guy with his own personal narrator.

correlations

penecillin = terrorism ~ and a really fascinating albeit gross history lesson.

plus:
not even sure what to do with this, but put it up here.

Index report

• Number of times that President Bush's "signing statements" have exempted his administration from provisions of new laws: 750
• Total number of times for ALL OTHER presidents since Washington: 568

Via Harpers

Watch yo ass.

Was driving around SF yesterday, doing some errands, saw 4 moto cops pulling people over, and in one case, having one person's car towed away.
Seems like a good time to slow it down.

Getting pulled over for speeding in SF? Does that happen?

just makes me giggle - 6 months later

They Do Have Lots of Wings in Asia

A little Asian boy sneezes without covering his mouth.

Black lady: Excuse you!
Asian mom: He's only 3, he didn't know any better.
Black lady: Haven't you heard of bird flu, motherfucka!

--M96 bus

Girl #1: I feel like shit. I think I've got the Asian Bird Flu.
Girl #2: Don't you mean Avian Bird Flu?
Girl #1: Whatever.

--56th & Broadway

Woman: Isn't it here in America?
Teen boy: Naw...it's in Japan. All these people be dying from it. Thank god Bush won't let it in the country.

--Associated Supermarket, Astoria

via Overheard in New York, Dec 19, 2005

The Concourse

Well, I'm going to be introduced to 'the concourse' for my first show there. new venue, and altho my friend JoJo says it has bad sound, i'm still pretty fired up.
While i was surfing around for info, i stumbled on this, this, and this, I must be the last person on earth to have heard them.

Knights of Cydonia has just so much political hooha running through it. Don't let that Mars exploration reference get past ya (reference to the Dub, or am i reading in? "And how can we win, when fools can be kings?). Also, make sure you listen for that QOTSA riff throughout...

City of Delusion is interesting. The mixing is so weird on this track with the vocals and guitars so up front, with the bass n drums all way in the back...and the fiddles/violins (I don't know enough to know the difference, if any. Uncle Anus, can you tell me?) bringing the middle eastern flair. wack. Don' forget the horns and Spanish guitar right through the middle. Excellent mixing.

And about SupermassiveBH, man, i just don't know what to think about this weird Beck/Prince sounding thingie....

Excited to hear the rest of it. I'll be surfing for leaks until it's released.

toying with LiveJournal

added my livejournal in the links section...
might play around wiht that, rather tan sticking with boring old blogspot.
check it out!

(p.s. to uncle anus - this counts as a post!)

free wifi in sf?

a great site about the proposed free wifi in SF.

a cool thing about math

social security gets a boost. the Dub is still trying to sell the S.S. giveaway to make wall street control the retirement plans, at the expense of the populace trying to figure out how they can be able to stop working some day.

rated 3 dammits ("there is still time" favoring heavily in the dammit numbers)

thanks

the stephen colbert thank you page.

certainly not new.

but making a resurgence!

HERE

DEBT! file under spam-a-lot!

I don't know what this means. But it sure is entertaining. We'll take your money, don't worry, we use the christian way! (i love the line - "use the cash for ANYTHING!")

eliminate your cash problems the christian way!

click to supersize!

net neutrality

this is a dailychuppler (ha, yer already here!)ALERT - awarded 5 dammits!
this has gotten my interest.
i test sent emails to some of my contacts at aol with this link, aol scrubbed the link from the email before it was delivered. i tested it multiple times.
CONCERNING! Even if you are still an aol user (hello? wake up!) that kinda activity should piss you off. actions here & here.

Harry Taylor - one ballsy mofo!

I couldn't have done this.
You can thank him here!
I'm composing my question, so that if i get a chance...

just two links

weird and useful.

i love this site!

dept of homeland security

DHS encourages individuals to report information concerning suspicious or criminal activity and cyber security incidents to Homeland Security.

Yeah. Who's getting played for a bitch? we are.

big dick

cheney


that's right folks, he's drunk and armed, and next in line. i just plain forgot how amusing this would be if i didn't live here. ay.

WIFI - SF?

an interesting read about privacy here

anthing else?

cool drifting vid

fun game. frustrating.

too good to pass up.

The Life and Times of Stinky Banwalla.


in other news:
ChadFoxes podomatics are just plain enjoyable.

well, it's

hysterical and scary.

oh, oh my. going to hell, while my tastebuds go to heaven! the dark nature of capitalism!

just plain and simple wrong.

might as well go for it!

gargle with this!

all better? please.

the return!

I’m here tonight;
What folly, it seems, to start an item like this.
These smells which numb our minds,

This feeling, which has been filtered;
The feeling of power,
So hard to relinquish

No tolkein here,
These are no gold lacquered spells.
My scrapings are that squeak

Which most credibly can stop here.
I’m here tonight,
I’m here tonight.

treatise on blog abandonment

gentle gentle reader(s?),
while it is clear that the chuppler has not posted in about 20 days, I do know that you are not having being forgetting about me, are youse?
If you demand answers (something I wish more of us do, btb), then know this: the 'rigors' of moving, the final semester, and my beer league has been getting in the way, along with a drastic lack of DSL.
oh, and this just in:

ENFP!

moon lesbians

What shall we use to fill the empty spaces,
Where we used to talk?
How shall I fill the final places?
How shall I complete the wall?

[glad i got that out]

giving

the slurper the slip:
part time job.
ends tomorrow. not soon enough.

item # 41863(a)

or, people who take their jobs too seriously:

"We'll run the risk.."
"What's the worst case scenario..."

Annoying, annoying people.

got any to add?

to:
uncle anus
I think you should go ahead and just do what you need to do. F those rumor mongering whores!

stop the slurping

so i realize that it is some sort of Asian culture thing to slurp the shit outta your food. i can respect that.
but don't come into my fookin cube and sit behind me and slurp and chomp every item of food you have to eat on your breaks. find somewhere else.
fercrissakes, please. don't make me stab you with a spork.

can't it end?

database entry

hello please ~ from the temp job:
"1 navy blue purse, 1 cream colored sweater, 1 peach and cream colored sweater, 1 peach, navy & cream colored sweater, 1 green sweater w/ plastic flowers, 1 red sweater, 1 turquoise sweater w/ pink, peach, yellow and lavender design, 1 light pink sweater w/ gray and white stripes, 1 kevin trudeau tape and newsletters"

good thinking to be bringing the mp3 player today, I's thanks the cheebus!

jodhpurs

You ever seen someone wearing jodhpurs?
Weird, isn't it?

does anybody

remember vera wang?

i'm considering a project where i take the lyrics from the wall and reinterpret the lyrics using whatever tickles my fancy.

my guess is most of the jokes will be far too inside to realize humor, but for some.....they might get hit and take first. they'll be pitched fast! oooooh, stingey.

main event

dancing in with the brass band!










our main man, Rohan!

virtual frosty

so maybe you know i worked at an ad agency...it was good times, bad job, good people. i left that job to go back to school.
anyway, i keep in touch with a mess of em, and they got this little funness out now.

You put the head, torso and legs together and make combos. sometimes they dance. my fave (so far) is the leather snow daddy. Head is found 1 page down, on the left, in the middle; torso and legs are the same, respectively.

more pics

I'm in the middle of finals!

some photo's

India [Hiatus]

I got back from India today with the dr.

An excellent adventure, complete with stomach woes.

Tales of Orchha Foot, Western Shit Road, Jahnsi (both the new imaginary {for now} camel and the filthiest train station i have ever witnessed), Mansenor Ass, Taj Mahal [biggest mausoleum ever!], delhi belly, old delhi (a whole street dedicated to paper! or an entire street of silver merchants! or spices!), the largest mosque in the world (so i'm told), and enough forts and palaces to make solomon blush.

and for Uncle Anus these are all random ponderings, musings, and tales of my trip. hot pics to come later!

but i gotta sleep and get these pics off my disk(s). J of JnJ, I'm gonna have some good entries for your 41st year contest....and study for finals.

i almost just posted "I'll be back" but I decided to spare you. and me, really.

it's only a model

Leanna Ortiz writes:
Take just a candy and become ready for 36 hours of love

Who can pass up an offer like that?

beautimus

a few jems

this (rodent saga)

&

this (caution, don't wet yourself)

[paitently awaiting my fork delivery! insert wells fargo wagon song] ----->

daily harm

The man sat at the bar. He was not waiting for anyone, no one was waiting for him. The bartender asked him no questions, the only thing the man asked for all night was matches for his cigars, and his particular poison, cranberry and vodka.
The drink was funny to the man; he, as a younger man, repeatedly swore that he would never drink a cranberry and vodka, his reason being that if he had ever had it, he would like it too much and drink too much, causing unwanted regurgitation. That reasoning was left over from his college days when his drinking had been much heavier, not that he didn’t like to drink now, but it was a different kind of drinking. His reason being that he liked cranberry juice too much, he actually used it as a hangover relief – cold, crisp and full of vitamin C. so he figured that if he drank too much of it, the mere idea of cranberry juice might nauseate him.
But, like so many of his personal rules, he broke his promise to himself, and, like he figured, he loved it. But he had yet to drink too much of it, and the cigars were lovely. So he drank, and smoked, and drank and smoked, and thought of increasingly sillier things.
Things like the idea he had for a short story, a story of gross misunderstanding, a story about a society that fears change, and throughout the whole story the inhabitants of this civilization are all scared to let on that although this is this overwhelming fear of change, they all secretly loved change. They all secretly craved change, and the big payoff of the story was that all this hidden change bursts loose upon the streets directly after a gigantic earthquake. He hadn’t quite figured out what happened to the culture after the change pours forth into the streets, but he knew it was the downfall of that society. He wanted to work into the story: them rebuilding a society where they openly love change and now the inhabitants all despise those little paper coin rollers. A time of change, perhaps, is the title?
Of course, this story is much m ore amusing to a man who is making it up, and consuming cran n’ voddies and smoking hearty Cuban seed cigars.

chupple mcspam

and now for some brilliant spam, if only it was all like this:

hospital lonely lost affect sight. line understand story has hurry argue wished your progress three. sad appeared allow over books longer surprise, anybody sugar passed work front dinner! duty hear progress thankyou lord,
planning instead sent force at studying, fasten laid season in dead
separate development food, best fine leaving surely commit buy knows
poison middle" drink planning example allowed acquaint recommend them exactly small wont" regular secretary college height. knowledge expected whatever studying company woman giving perform interesting.
moon wanted recess grammar interest tongue. for suddenly blow than. sitting forest difficult grow, handsome nature lesson gotten! whose again now wrong sound, deep exclaimed chapter husband mentioned!
telling trust may occurrence countenance first college gone luckily work" win break yours above boys,

i love you.

chupple mcswing (part III)

Three minutes later, three men, in suits, walked into the bar. They were hit men. The man that they were looking for was sitting at the bar, in front of an empty glass. The bartender looked at the hit men entering and muscled, in a grunt, toward his only patron, “That’s it McSwing, you’re done”.
McSwing looked in the mirror behind the bar and analyzed the three poppers. Then he fell off his stool, feigning a drunken stupor, and groped around on the floor for a while, while the three men grinned at each other.
None of the three killers saw it coming. The bartender had heard about it, but that night he saw it. While on the floor, sliding his way through the spilt beer, cigar ash and empty packs of cigarettes, McSwing removed the skin from his right arm. “It wasn’t really an arm, after all!” the bartender would tell his boss, Jack, later. It was an extremely modified sawed-off ten-gauge shotgun. McSwing racked the weapon, and slammed it home.

The last thing that the biggest man heard was the dreaded “chick-chook” of the round being chambered. Then the roar. The other two took heavy damage from the initial blast. One, named Chuck, understood what was happening as soon as he saw the big man go down. Chuck reached for his piece, a trusty Desert Eagle .45, which always reminded him of his father, Java Joe. But Chuck’s attempt to reach for his weapon was interrupted by a sudden realization that Chuck’s right arm no longer existed. Chuck knew that was bad news for him, and he also knew what was next, him. He was right on the former, but slightly incorrect on the latter, if only for a moment, and during that moment before the third roar from the surprise cannon, Chuck thought of his father. He remembered seeing his father in the hospital, on his deathbed, dying of stomach cancer.

If this is a dream, i'm glad you're having it with me.

Someday, When we are all dead

Someday,

When we are all dead

We’ll think back to the thoughts

And the ant, or the mutant spaceship

Can equally experience the doubts

The significance of being naked.

Which all should know

Has been forgotten

Inside our heads.

Replaced, most effectively with toxins

Mostly shit we made to perfection.

The truth of our moments

The experience of our orgasm

How are you doin this mornin?

[{(Fuck)}]

chupple this.

Tape, Mind, Smell, Scrambled &

Of dances, and towers, and time on tape

Of catchy little numbers, so tiny you can’t see
Of insidious little creatures screaming inside of your mind.

But this is no video
This.
Your catchy jazz numbers.
Your sweet luscious sweat smell.

Why the romance of these little people
Of which it’s so scrambled.

At least there is something
I HEAR THEM MUMBLE

chuppling poet

Inches or Miles
We missed you that first time by inches or miles.
We’ll never know.
We are unable to contact you.
Please call immediately.
Our actions can be unnerving.
Our attitudes shock many.

We make it slow.
We’ll take your items.
We thought you were ideal.
Your experience has flown free, inside our soul.
We are scarred, and scared, but heal with your inches and miles.

Come on up to the house.

mystery shopping

so i got a mystery shop today.
i can't decide if it is completely against my morals or not.
mystery shopping, on the one hand, tis cool - i get to check out places i normally wouldn't go, and usually to places i haven't been before (Daly City [Daily - Shitty], for instance, today). It's also interesting to know which companies like to have this done. Tells you they are expecting a certain standard for their employees. I think I like that.

But (he bolded) the majority of the shops are not used to make sure that shoppers are getting excellent service at their local pizza joint. The majority are designed to reward (or punish) the employees at the local pizza joint, or movie theater, or amusement park, where the customer is to be UPSOLD. "Ok, sir, that's a pepperoni pizza slice, and small coke and a churro. Would you like to upsize that coke to a large? [does anyone remember the slogan that burker king [or was it mcdonalds?] used to make the meal sides (fries, rings, the drink) Ginormous, "GO LARGE!" {america follows - "Make me fat!" they screamed.})
ok, sidebar over, anyway, so I'm having a hard time with it.

IN fact, I wrote this post in draft on August 23. I've since quit since then, for a variety of reasons (hate it, they don't pay enough for the trouble, they pay slow, not to mention the moral annoyance).

oh. oh my.

NSFW!

i mean damn

luther wright.
what a guy.
he's got this band, 'the wrongs'.
yeah, luther wright and the wrongs. they are the the guys that did the improbable. here's a review -
"Luther Wright and the Wrongs pull off the improbable. Where the original floated on some distant, emotionally wrought plain, the Wrongs rump and whump, making you want to grab your girl and two-step. Far from sounding nostalgic, the music feels urgent."- New York Times June 30, 2002

so they did that. and i was, you know, googling the guy to see what else was out there, as you do.
currently there is this song that i can't seem to hear enough of. It's called 'hurtin fer certain'. on the album of the same name.
i got this download from his website, but as of now, (java is cooler) that appears to be crashed out.
point is, the song just bounces gleefully, with lyrics like:
'all the words that we said, lie stone cold somewhere defeated...
i sleep a-lone, and all i ever dream of, is a farm and a field of green bud'
so i ordered the damn thing. can't much remember what music i bought last, full price. damn thing has gotta come from canadia so i get in 3 weeks or so.

[car update] no grover (or friday)

just plenty of DPT imcompetance.

Grover, don't lose faith!

I got two tickets from DPT today, just now.
8/10 & 8/17.
2400 block of laguna st, pac heights!
with that bad clutch! wow, i am impressed with that thief!
going to check it out (teh area) shortly.

so much for DPT communicating to the SFPD and vice versa.

what do i do if it's found? sheesh!

more news soon!

[what the hell am i talking about? - this this & this]

haiku chupple

so i was thinking, man, i sure am disappointed by the federal govt these days. and state government doesn't seem to be any better. city govt seems to be ok, but still something to be desired.
so what does this all mean? jaded as i am by both the RNC and DNC, realizing that 3rd parties have little chance of defeating the two giant parties and their masses of wealth, what is one to do?

Go to the movies. This 'taking back' is just the type of activity that brings about change. Elevating people to the point of things and just 'gettin ur done' charms me. It's exciting, and fun. and i haven't been to one of these drive-ins, yet. gotta go. how are we getting there? Surely, not in my car. That status hasn't changed.

Be well, you good people of earth. i gotta do some homework.

the chuppler.

kyra (it's Ki-ra)

Settle down, and take a deep breath.

long but worth it!

yes

FSM - the GAME!

for bassoons

Jesus Danced

need fortune. have booze.

You Are a Martini

There's no other way to say it: you're a total lush. You hold your liquor well, and you hold a lot of it!

What Mixed Drink Are You?

fish judging ocean

you ever flown to Dulles International Airport (IAD)? it's a big weird airport outside Washington D.C.

It is this older (1962) airport that is trying to deal with strange new security protocols, and being an airport in the nation's capital, there is a lot of air traffic and whatnot. It also is sorta out there (Virginia). Reagan Intl is also in the area, mucho air traffic there.

So Dulles is the hub airport of Independence airlines, and i recently flew through Dulles to get to Alan & AK47's weddin in Howell, MI. Which is just outside Detroit. Howell, you may care to know, has the Melon Festival. It was going on the weekend of Alan and Ak47's weddin. The plan was to fly in to Detroit, get a rental car, drive to Howl (that's how i say it, so let's type it thataway) meet up at the beer tent good plan i thought.

So now you got the background.

car is still gone!

As you can clearly see here, my car has not been returned.










As you can see upon closer inspection, yes, it hasn't been miniaturized, borrowed without asking (glue! I need glue!), or some other thing.
Still gone.
Gone, Gone, Goner.











oh yeah, the streetcleaner hasn't come by, either.

got tag

List ten songs that you are currently digging ... it doesn't matter what genre they are from, whether they have words, or even if they're no good, but they must be songs you're really enjoying right now. Post these instructions, the artists, and the ten songs in your ____.

Time is running out - muse
(anything from) 'rebuild the wall' - luther wright and the wrongs
glass, concrete and stone - david byrne
city on the hill - fire wrecks the forest
amitriptyline - john vanderslice
the roses you grew - the larval organs
i miss the war - mk ultra
people ain't no good - nick cave
dress sexy at my funeral - smog
don't slander me - the sound of urchin

no tags. have a great day. and no, i wasn't listening to any of this in 1993.

oh yeah,
she sells sanctuary - the cult just popped on my itunes. honorable mention.

you take a short break

and everything amuses you (me)?

catching up

some people i know are talking about this and it is indeed funny.

one of my faves:
In the beginning... He created a mountain, trees, and a midget.

p.s. - oh yeah, this. is the term counterpoint? sheeit.

p.p.s. - also favorite! -

WHY YOU SHOULD CONVERT TO FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTERISM
Flimsy moral standards.
Every friday is a relgious holiday. If your work/school objects to that, demand your religious beliefs are respected and threaten to call the ACLU.
Our heaven is WAY better. We've got a Stripper Factory AND a Beer Volcano.

transportation hell*

here's what my day sounds like today;
beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.
"Hi, I'm looking for a part, and I've got the Part Number, yeah I can hold....
Yeah, I know it's discontinued, but I'm looking for one anyway. You don't have one then? Ok, thanks!
beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.
Hi, I'm looking for a part, and I've ...."
Cycle, and repeat.

You see, my motorcycle got knocked the fook over the other night, and someone thought enough to pick it up, and not enough to leave a note. damn them.
So the damage that I have would have been prevented by this handy bolt-on addition.
But no.
So here:
google find me here!
99950-70104

mucho thanks

an old friend of my brother's (B) had this lexicon database on his website before the interweb blew open. It was full of amusing definitions, and actually had (has) this listed:

*personal hell -

When everything seems to be working against you, you are in a personal hell. Significant others will turn bitchy, jobs will become shitty, school will become overbearing, you'll get ticketed, and all manner of evil begins stacking up at a geometric rate. No one person can be targeted as the source and no one else can share in your torture. On the good side, once you realize that you are in a personal hell they seem to dissolve.

so my *transportation hell is not as majestically mind-blowing as this, as I'm mostly in a vehicular hell. I'm secretly hoping (can I be secretly posting a hope?) that by discussing this said "v.hell" that I will disengage the primordial evil spells and spirits which have lately been manifesting in my automotive house. Think it will work?

identify

missouri loves company

anonymous.

car update

there is no car update.

still gone.

by now, every thief has gone through and removed all things i ever liked and left in the car. we, here at the daily chuppler, are thinking of starting up a pool on when the car might be found. Thinking $1 per 6 hour period in a day. Winner gets 75% of all proceeds. Closest person, that is. and ties are settled by a rochambeau.

in you are interested...post you wager in the comments following this post only.

i got aug 18, 12pm - 6pm. also, the 8/29 12p-6p.

a funnyism found when exploring the webbery -
"My dad used to tell me that Robert Englund was a nice man under that make up. That won't stop him from killing me in my sleep, Dad."

This just in - all future rochambeau (rock, paper, scissors) duels shall now be as follows:
A similar game called hunter, shotgun and tiger uses more exaggerated gestures. The players turn away from each other. On the count of 3, the players both turn around towards each other showing one of the three gestures. An aiming gesture is the shotgun. A roar with two raised craws is the tiger. No gesture is the hunter. Since the gesture requires big movements, it is more appropriate then Stone Paper Scissors when there is an audience watching from a distance. It is funny to watch the cheaters trying to change a gesture at the last minute. Hunter wins shotgun; shotgun wins tiger; tiger wins hunter.

Thank the Jeebus for wikipedia!

and, of course, this: I just don't know how we've ever lived without it. seriously.

bevan

So i emailed Gavin Newsom and Bevan Dufty in regards to my stolen car. I thought that maybe by contacting my local government authorities (Gav's the mayor, Bevan my supervisor) they could, how you say, expedite the process of finding my stolen car.

Bevan actually wrote me back, and cc'd 7 of his friends/associates/colleagues in the SFPD and the SF DPT. I am very impressed with his response. His email spoke of each of the people cc'd, how he knew them, what their role is in local govt, and their phone number.

I have received phone calls from a police officer each day since then, apprising me of the situation (car not found) and what they are trying to do to find it. Hell, even if its all bluff and they aren't doing anything, it feels better to have someone contacting you about it. L's car was stolen, and her friend found it 3 days later, before the police even had put it into the system. I'm impressed with Bevan's help.

Sidebar: I took a course on the history of the American City last semester. Learning about bosses, their reform, and finally good govt (goo-goo) I suppose influenced me in contacting Bevan. I think there isn't enough of this kind of communication between govt and the people. It's refreshing. I heart SF, even though my car was stolen.

I'm now resigned to waiting for either a friend or the police to contact me alerting me that my car has been located. That's really the thing that happens. DPT finds it, after the thief is finished with it (out of gas) and it's been parked somewhere where it's about to get a ticket. Computer tells the DPT peep that it's stolen, DPT contacts Police, Police contact me. I get about 20 minutes to get to my car before it's towed to the yard. Either that, or it's being chopped for parts.

Updates to continue. Go Bevan. Got my vote.

lookin

cuz L's car was found so close, I thought I'd take a look see around Hayes valley. Her car was taken a block or so from where mine was, maybe the same person took it to the same place....right?
So I'm driving around Hayes Valley with my roommate S (her car), and didn't find it. the whole time i'm looking i'm wondering what, if anything, starting to look for my car in the ghetto says.
Hurts my head.

p.s. - car still gone. no luck in bayview either.

more photos

Well, it's Blue, not green. But a better pic.

Car

Now my car has been stolen.
Seen it?

Blue Saturn, 1994.

License 3 FED 727

I wasn't even driving it, just moving it across the street, back and forth (street cleaning), because it has this bad clutch. So if you are in my neighborhood, or close, give a look out. Pretty sure it didn't get far. I'll be chronicling this event. Stoopid, stoopid thief.

Yippee.

I love to push the Spamalot!

Well, I haven't seen this one yet...
Have I told you of my love/hate for Spam? The meat, and the interweb varities. What the hell is going on in that picture?

millar larry wrote:

Dear Sir:

My Name is Larry Millar, I am serving in Iraq, I will disclose/proof my identity to you when it is safe to do so.

I have to urgently evacuate some money, totaling US$8,800,000 ( Eight million, eight hundred thousand US dollars) clean legal notes, and all in US$100 bills out of here to a safe country having found a secure way to do so.

SOURCE OF MONEY:

Some money in various currencies were discovered concealed in barrels with piles of weapons and ammunitions at a location near one of Saddam’s old palaces during a rescue operation several months ago, and it was agreed by the few of us present that the money be shared amongst us, this was an illegal thing to do though, but I tell you what? no compensation can make up for the risks we are taking with our lives in this hell hole.

The above figure was given to me as my share, and for several reasons, concealing this volume of cash here has been a big problem/source of distraction to me, I however found a temporary solution with the help of a UN contact working here, whose office enjoys some immunity, and was able to get the package to a safe location entirely out of trouble spot, where they have been for the past 8 months.

She does not know the real contents of the packages, and must not know, but believes that they belong to an Asian American who died in an air raid, and before giving up, trusted me to hand them over to his business associate in Europe.

I have now found a secure way of getting the package out of Iraq, and request for your assistance to work with me to complete this. I am ready to give you US$2M for the role you will play in this, but should you have reasons to reject this offer, please destroy this mail as any leakage will be too bad for us.

I will continue with more details as soon as you let me know your position. But we have to take this up as soon as possible for reasons I will explain when I hear from you.

Please respond through my email.

Sincerely,

Larry Millar

So. Three things...
1) I love the fiction. This is great fiction. It's got action, adventure, a potential love interest, intrigue, moral dilemnas, compassion, greed. MAN!
2) I request you ping the crap outta Larry Millar at his hotmail address. I'm gonna check in, and see if I get "phished".
3) Nigeria scams have gotten nicely developed! How many peeps you think will go for this one?

prosecute

sheesh.

not good.

just the story title kills me

Four dead in cockfight grenade attack

hmmm

i'm temping right now...for the week.
admin type junk.

this just in: the guy that I'm working for right now has an office that smells of hot dogs. Scroll to favorite image.

how about that?

code

walking on market this morning...and i heard this guy in a suit say into his cell phone,
"Tell Danny we're not selling Denny's till Aladdin hits". Besides that being a completely bizarre statement with all it's own hoorah, I'm just touched by the whole thing.

Had me reeling for two blocks, and I never even got a good look at the suit!

Hell, maybe it's just cuz i'm 30 today.

this tonight.

hey buddy, can you lend me Rs 2.5 crore?

on the subject of zombies

Why is there no, shall I call it, 'common knowledge' when it comes to character's portrayed in zombie movies?
'Oh my GOD? They're bitey!!!!' So frustrating. Haven't you ever seen a damn zombie movie? Huh? Yes, it transfers to you if you are bitten. No, you can't get rid of it...[altho, I do like The Evil Dead's way out of possession/evil/badness/whichhaveyou, lopping!!! I haven't seen that yet, zombie bites your arm, you lop it off! would it work? is this a cross genre idea?]

Yes, the only way to kill them is to smash their brains....props to Shaun for new creative ways to smash brains...

Sheesh.

Make a damn zombie movie with self aware people who have seen a zombie movie. that would be scary.

big dork

just realized that is two (2) count em...
star wars related entries.
back to back.

apologies, if that's what's needed.

laugh at this...

R.O.T.B.

TOMORROW!










on another note:
yes, another Star Wars spoof... animated lego?
maybe you seen it, maybe you ain't.

You ain't seen it?
Do me a favor and stay to the end of it.
The closing credits are worth it!
Clone Trooper Orchestra!?! Is that a Bassoon???

stand by (ion control)

BLF! Strikes again!


Hurry yourselves to 14th and mission to see this beautimous display.

just guess

lookie who it is!

guesses as to what she did?

The supersuckers say - 'Your mom RULES!'

The coolest mom ever!

GOLDEN, Colo. - A woman who told police she wanted to be a "cool mom" pleaded guilty to sexual assault charges Monday for having sex with high school boys at parties where authorities said she supplied drugs and alcohol.
Silvia Johnson, 40, pleaded guilty to two misdemeanor counts of sexual assault and nine felony counts of contributing to the delinquency of a minor. As part of a plea agreement, prosecutors dropped two counts of distribution of methamphetamine.
"She described herself as a `cool mom,'" Detective R.J. Vander Veen wrote in the affidavit. He said Johnson told investigators "she was never popular with classmates in high school and now began `feeling like one of the group.'"
Prosecutors did not recommend a sentence, but each sexual assault count carries up to four years in prison, and each count of contributing to the delinquency of a minor carries up to nine years, district attorney's spokeswoman Pam Russell said.
Johnson, who is free on bail, held parties for the boys almost weekly between October 2003 and October 2004, authorities said. She was accused of providing drugs and alcohol to eight boys and having sex with five of them.
Police said the investigation began after one of the boys told his mother about the encounters, and she reported it to authorities.

Who the hell wants to go back to high school? Jeezie-Chreezie! Man. Speaking of hell and christ and anti-christ (work with me here), it seems that these here kids are just plum silly:

PALERMO, Italy (Reuters) - An Italian couple stole 50,000 euros from a woman in the Sicilian city of Palermo after convincing her they were vampires who would impregnate her with the son of the Anti- Christ if she did not pay them.
The man, a cabaret singer, and his girlfriend took the money from their victim over four years by selling her pills at 3,000 euros each that they said would abort the Anti-Christ's son.
Police uncovered the fraud after the 47-year-old woman's family became concerned when they discovered she had spent all her savings, local news agencies AGI and ANSA reported.

That's funny for a ton of reasons, especially because it seems inspired by this mediocre movie...only saved by visions of hell and the generally entertaining catholic bashing and religious iconery! Woah!

p.s. - if you went there i'm - Bulbo Bracegirdle of Hardbottle & Elrond Súrion. occassionally i'll irritate even myself with this type of dore-kee-ness. i mean the hobbitts-es, not the fair! scroll down for the vol opps!

more spamfilter!

classics....

Christian singles. A match made in heaven.

When you see bodice ripper related to philosopher, it means that tea party living with chestnut goes to sleep.

But they need to remember how knowingly pine cone over wakes up.

Blush carefree betrayal subjectivity klaxon

Influential culprit Methuen chevron complete

Rock hard in twenty minutes.
Rock her all night long.

drunk

tonight.

hiccups to beat the band.

went to swig's 1st anniversary.
was a hoot!
like it when people get excited and actually dress up!

anyway, photo's posted if i ever see them!

must go to sleep. the drink might have had it's way with me! and i don't know what this is1111
THEY LOOK LIKE ONE'S RIGHT?

happy july 22nd!

wanna go to a party sat night? should be fun! in nOE.

productivity gone!

this game is killing me!

new bar

so my friends opened a new bar called johncolins.
it's those nice guys from Wish from behind the bar there, got their own joint. A nice space, and it's in a neighborhood that could use a little bit more nice. 90 Natoma. just off 2nd, near that E Rickenbacker's place with all the motorcycles.. check it out. Nice 2 buck happy hour for beer. mmmm, beer.

Eric Hoffer

We deal with the truth as the cook deals with meat and vegetables.

viva

went to vegas...

gambled, drank, ate, exercised my right to arm bears (photo to come back with the L). All things America (fuck yeah!) and A-Mare-I-Cuhn.
Las Vegas.
Damn, was it hot.
Decided to go to the store to pick up supplies (read: beer) for the fridge in the hotel room.
Found out from the not so helpful desk clerk that there was a quickie-mart was on the corner, but a VONS was three blocks down.
A more attractive selection was awaiting us there, we supposed. Got to the Slushie emporium, decided that wasn't going to do, and got about 1000 feet down the street to the supposed VONS when we both realized the shear impossibility of continuing the journey.
It was hard to breathe.
Had been out walking for maybe 10 minutes. Hot wind at our backs meant a hot wind in our face on the way back.
Having no sign of VONS. walked back to the quickie mart, with hot wind in our faces, and just about melted into the store from the door. AH, Air Conditioning. After taking a ten minute or so refuge there (periodically opening and standing in the doors of the refrigerated section), we headed back the ¾ block back to the hotel.
Later, in consultancy with others about the journey, discovered that it was 116 degrees Farenheit during our death march.
that's hot. that's 'oh i killed my dog by leaving him in the car' hot. Sheeit.

Relax! Eventually, we got beer. Thanks for your concern, tho!

Best two Tshirts I saw all weekend were this and one that said "Gold Digger. Like a hooker...only smarter."

Rode the NY NY rolly coaster. Wasn’t drunk, like the previous time I rode it. Not a bad ride, but a little short for the $12.50 entry. Ouch.
Played a little video poker, drank a little beer, saw the MGM lions a few times.
Mostly hid from the outside.
Damn hot.
The pool was a good refuge. But once you got in, you couldn’t get out, the poolside concrete was boiling. Cook an egg. Shoulda tried that.
Went to the Wynn.
It’s the newest of the big casino’s on the strip. It’s aight. Fancy and all, and a nice touch by having more nature than most. But still a giant hotel with a big casino. Giant water fountains. What’s that logic? You got a desert city, and you surround these giant hotels with moats. Damn mall with a moat. Illusion? Silly! Pirates of the caribbean gone WRONG.

chilly wonker

So, i went to see the new Johnny Depp/Tim Burton creation Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, and I have to say that it's good.

Very clever, funny, modernized version of the classic(s).

I was very excited to see an updated version of the boat trip through the tunnel...and it was good.

Here's my problem. Why? Why is it necessary to make an updated version of an excellent movie with today's stars? We can go on and on and on about this idea of remakes, and it still won't change the fact that the original, in most cases, is better.

Don't get me wrong, this is a great version...but repetitous. A new ending (hooray!) [not a spoiler, but I always enjoyed Gene Wilder's nasty side in Willy, at the end] helps this version, and freshens it, but dang. i'm not sure what i wanted. Depp's great. I guess I wanted a new vision...and i got a revamp. guess i shoulda seen that coming.

Still see it. but i give it an 'ok to rent' thumbs up. doesn't need to be seen in the theater.

check out this link of Depp being interviewed about Charlie.

and is this proof of something?

Depp: Somebody sent me an article where Gene Wilder said, "Why would they remake Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory?" We didn’t remake "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory," we remade (the book) "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory." It’s based on the same book they based theirs on. Making a statement that they only made this film because of the money is a really odd statement to make from a guy who has been in the business as long as he has ... all movies were made because somebody somewhere wanted a return on their dollar that they spent. Ultimately it’s a business.

Final say: a great movie this would be if I hadn't seen it before. Gene Wilder (and his songs) rock this version.

picked up by my spam filter...AWESOME!

Thank you for e-mailing President Bush.  Your ideas and comments are very
important to him.

Because of the large volume of e-mail received, the President cannot
personally respond to each message.

In addition to President@WhiteHouse.gov, we have developed White House Web
Mail, an automated e-mail response system.  Please access
http://www.whitehouse.gov/webmail to submit comments on a specific issue.

Additionally, we welcome you to visit our website for the most up-to-date
information on current events and topics of interest to you.

tweaks

how's it looking?
i think better.

cool game here.
watch out, it's a timekiller.

and a good line

As President Bush said in October, "We are fighting these terrorists with our military in Afghanistan and Iraq and beyond so we do not have to face them in the streets of our own cities." Tragically, the terrible bombing in London shows we are now paying a horrible price for this silly, dangerous, short-sighted, and truly dishonest line of reasoning.


from Norm

well...

You Are 60% American

Most times you are proud to be an American. Though sometimes the good ole US of A makes you cringe Still, you know there's no place better suited to be your home. You love your freedom and no one's going to take it away from you!

How American Are You?

house of the dead!

It came in the mail.
All hail Netflix as the devil that it is.
I heart you, Netflix.

House of the dead, where/when? Still got the projector, kids?The sound has to be turned way UP! Finally T will know of the glory. And can stop bashing Boll. And this smallerdemon can know of the full joy of zombies with the quickness.

Anybody know of software clashes between itunes and Firefox? prolly just my crap processor. found this in my searchery, tho. note, tweak the settings to select itunes as your player. damn kids and their interwebbery!

now look here

online revolution, my ass.anyway, tryin to get my ass in gear about this damn website which i have supposedly been writing for, but getting the ball rolling has been the most excruciating. and the pay sucks, so that's not much help...tell you what.
This here MAY be the weirdest mod i seen yet. you be the judge.

enough!

trying

so i went on the ALC
it was long and dry, but cool. i guess it raised enough money to keep the agenciies it supports around for another year, and pulls them outta debt. a good thing, methinks.
before that was camping with my high school friends, BCT 05.
and camping before that on the weekend, feels like i haven't been home in a month. nice to be back in the city...
anyway, just testing out this whole blog thing, working out the kinks...

gots to get me a job!