need fortune. have booze.

You Are a Martini

There's no other way to say it: you're a total lush. You hold your liquor well, and you hold a lot of it!

What Mixed Drink Are You?

fish judging ocean

you ever flown to Dulles International Airport (IAD)? it's a big weird airport outside Washington D.C.

It is this older (1962) airport that is trying to deal with strange new security protocols, and being an airport in the nation's capital, there is a lot of air traffic and whatnot. It also is sorta out there (Virginia). Reagan Intl is also in the area, mucho air traffic there.

So Dulles is the hub airport of Independence airlines, and i recently flew through Dulles to get to Alan & AK47's weddin in Howell, MI. Which is just outside Detroit. Howell, you may care to know, has the Melon Festival. It was going on the weekend of Alan and Ak47's weddin. The plan was to fly in to Detroit, get a rental car, drive to Howl (that's how i say it, so let's type it thataway) meet up at the beer tent good plan i thought.

So now you got the background.

car is still gone!

As you can clearly see here, my car has not been returned.










As you can see upon closer inspection, yes, it hasn't been miniaturized, borrowed without asking (glue! I need glue!), or some other thing.
Still gone.
Gone, Gone, Goner.











oh yeah, the streetcleaner hasn't come by, either.

got tag

List ten songs that you are currently digging ... it doesn't matter what genre they are from, whether they have words, or even if they're no good, but they must be songs you're really enjoying right now. Post these instructions, the artists, and the ten songs in your ____.

Time is running out - muse
(anything from) 'rebuild the wall' - luther wright and the wrongs
glass, concrete and stone - david byrne
city on the hill - fire wrecks the forest
amitriptyline - john vanderslice
the roses you grew - the larval organs
i miss the war - mk ultra
people ain't no good - nick cave
dress sexy at my funeral - smog
don't slander me - the sound of urchin

no tags. have a great day. and no, i wasn't listening to any of this in 1993.

oh yeah,
she sells sanctuary - the cult just popped on my itunes. honorable mention.

you take a short break

and everything amuses you (me)?

catching up

some people i know are talking about this and it is indeed funny.

one of my faves:
In the beginning... He created a mountain, trees, and a midget.

p.s. - oh yeah, this. is the term counterpoint? sheeit.

p.p.s. - also favorite! -

WHY YOU SHOULD CONVERT TO FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTERISM
Flimsy moral standards.
Every friday is a relgious holiday. If your work/school objects to that, demand your religious beliefs are respected and threaten to call the ACLU.
Our heaven is WAY better. We've got a Stripper Factory AND a Beer Volcano.

transportation hell*

here's what my day sounds like today;
beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.
"Hi, I'm looking for a part, and I've got the Part Number, yeah I can hold....
Yeah, I know it's discontinued, but I'm looking for one anyway. You don't have one then? Ok, thanks!
beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.
Hi, I'm looking for a part, and I've ...."
Cycle, and repeat.

You see, my motorcycle got knocked the fook over the other night, and someone thought enough to pick it up, and not enough to leave a note. damn them.
So the damage that I have would have been prevented by this handy bolt-on addition.
But no.
So here:
google find me here!
99950-70104

mucho thanks

an old friend of my brother's (B) had this lexicon database on his website before the interweb blew open. It was full of amusing definitions, and actually had (has) this listed:

*personal hell -

When everything seems to be working against you, you are in a personal hell. Significant others will turn bitchy, jobs will become shitty, school will become overbearing, you'll get ticketed, and all manner of evil begins stacking up at a geometric rate. No one person can be targeted as the source and no one else can share in your torture. On the good side, once you realize that you are in a personal hell they seem to dissolve.

so my *transportation hell is not as majestically mind-blowing as this, as I'm mostly in a vehicular hell. I'm secretly hoping (can I be secretly posting a hope?) that by discussing this said "v.hell" that I will disengage the primordial evil spells and spirits which have lately been manifesting in my automotive house. Think it will work?

identify

missouri loves company

anonymous.

car update

there is no car update.

still gone.

by now, every thief has gone through and removed all things i ever liked and left in the car. we, here at the daily chuppler, are thinking of starting up a pool on when the car might be found. Thinking $1 per 6 hour period in a day. Winner gets 75% of all proceeds. Closest person, that is. and ties are settled by a rochambeau.

in you are interested...post you wager in the comments following this post only.

i got aug 18, 12pm - 6pm. also, the 8/29 12p-6p.

a funnyism found when exploring the webbery -
"My dad used to tell me that Robert Englund was a nice man under that make up. That won't stop him from killing me in my sleep, Dad."

This just in - all future rochambeau (rock, paper, scissors) duels shall now be as follows:
A similar game called hunter, shotgun and tiger uses more exaggerated gestures. The players turn away from each other. On the count of 3, the players both turn around towards each other showing one of the three gestures. An aiming gesture is the shotgun. A roar with two raised craws is the tiger. No gesture is the hunter. Since the gesture requires big movements, it is more appropriate then Stone Paper Scissors when there is an audience watching from a distance. It is funny to watch the cheaters trying to change a gesture at the last minute. Hunter wins shotgun; shotgun wins tiger; tiger wins hunter.

Thank the Jeebus for wikipedia!

and, of course, this: I just don't know how we've ever lived without it. seriously.

bevan

So i emailed Gavin Newsom and Bevan Dufty in regards to my stolen car. I thought that maybe by contacting my local government authorities (Gav's the mayor, Bevan my supervisor) they could, how you say, expedite the process of finding my stolen car.

Bevan actually wrote me back, and cc'd 7 of his friends/associates/colleagues in the SFPD and the SF DPT. I am very impressed with his response. His email spoke of each of the people cc'd, how he knew them, what their role is in local govt, and their phone number.

I have received phone calls from a police officer each day since then, apprising me of the situation (car not found) and what they are trying to do to find it. Hell, even if its all bluff and they aren't doing anything, it feels better to have someone contacting you about it. L's car was stolen, and her friend found it 3 days later, before the police even had put it into the system. I'm impressed with Bevan's help.

Sidebar: I took a course on the history of the American City last semester. Learning about bosses, their reform, and finally good govt (goo-goo) I suppose influenced me in contacting Bevan. I think there isn't enough of this kind of communication between govt and the people. It's refreshing. I heart SF, even though my car was stolen.

I'm now resigned to waiting for either a friend or the police to contact me alerting me that my car has been located. That's really the thing that happens. DPT finds it, after the thief is finished with it (out of gas) and it's been parked somewhere where it's about to get a ticket. Computer tells the DPT peep that it's stolen, DPT contacts Police, Police contact me. I get about 20 minutes to get to my car before it's towed to the yard. Either that, or it's being chopped for parts.

Updates to continue. Go Bevan. Got my vote.

lookin

cuz L's car was found so close, I thought I'd take a look see around Hayes valley. Her car was taken a block or so from where mine was, maybe the same person took it to the same place....right?
So I'm driving around Hayes Valley with my roommate S (her car), and didn't find it. the whole time i'm looking i'm wondering what, if anything, starting to look for my car in the ghetto says.
Hurts my head.

p.s. - car still gone. no luck in bayview either.

more photos

Well, it's Blue, not green. But a better pic.

Car

Now my car has been stolen.
Seen it?

Blue Saturn, 1994.

License 3 FED 727

I wasn't even driving it, just moving it across the street, back and forth (street cleaning), because it has this bad clutch. So if you are in my neighborhood, or close, give a look out. Pretty sure it didn't get far. I'll be chronicling this event. Stoopid, stoopid thief.

Yippee.

I love to push the Spamalot!

Well, I haven't seen this one yet...
Have I told you of my love/hate for Spam? The meat, and the interweb varities. What the hell is going on in that picture?

millar larry wrote:

Dear Sir:

My Name is Larry Millar, I am serving in Iraq, I will disclose/proof my identity to you when it is safe to do so.

I have to urgently evacuate some money, totaling US$8,800,000 ( Eight million, eight hundred thousand US dollars) clean legal notes, and all in US$100 bills out of here to a safe country having found a secure way to do so.

SOURCE OF MONEY:

Some money in various currencies were discovered concealed in barrels with piles of weapons and ammunitions at a location near one of Saddam’s old palaces during a rescue operation several months ago, and it was agreed by the few of us present that the money be shared amongst us, this was an illegal thing to do though, but I tell you what? no compensation can make up for the risks we are taking with our lives in this hell hole.

The above figure was given to me as my share, and for several reasons, concealing this volume of cash here has been a big problem/source of distraction to me, I however found a temporary solution with the help of a UN contact working here, whose office enjoys some immunity, and was able to get the package to a safe location entirely out of trouble spot, where they have been for the past 8 months.

She does not know the real contents of the packages, and must not know, but believes that they belong to an Asian American who died in an air raid, and before giving up, trusted me to hand them over to his business associate in Europe.

I have now found a secure way of getting the package out of Iraq, and request for your assistance to work with me to complete this. I am ready to give you US$2M for the role you will play in this, but should you have reasons to reject this offer, please destroy this mail as any leakage will be too bad for us.

I will continue with more details as soon as you let me know your position. But we have to take this up as soon as possible for reasons I will explain when I hear from you.

Please respond through my email.

Sincerely,

Larry Millar

So. Three things...
1) I love the fiction. This is great fiction. It's got action, adventure, a potential love interest, intrigue, moral dilemnas, compassion, greed. MAN!
2) I request you ping the crap outta Larry Millar at his hotmail address. I'm gonna check in, and see if I get "phished".
3) Nigeria scams have gotten nicely developed! How many peeps you think will go for this one?

prosecute

sheesh.

not good.

just the story title kills me

Four dead in cockfight grenade attack

hmmm

i'm temping right now...for the week.
admin type junk.

this just in: the guy that I'm working for right now has an office that smells of hot dogs. Scroll to favorite image.

how about that?

code

walking on market this morning...and i heard this guy in a suit say into his cell phone,
"Tell Danny we're not selling Denny's till Aladdin hits". Besides that being a completely bizarre statement with all it's own hoorah, I'm just touched by the whole thing.

Had me reeling for two blocks, and I never even got a good look at the suit!

Hell, maybe it's just cuz i'm 30 today.

this tonight.

hey buddy, can you lend me Rs 2.5 crore?

on the subject of zombies

Why is there no, shall I call it, 'common knowledge' when it comes to character's portrayed in zombie movies?
'Oh my GOD? They're bitey!!!!' So frustrating. Haven't you ever seen a damn zombie movie? Huh? Yes, it transfers to you if you are bitten. No, you can't get rid of it...[altho, I do like The Evil Dead's way out of possession/evil/badness/whichhaveyou, lopping!!! I haven't seen that yet, zombie bites your arm, you lop it off! would it work? is this a cross genre idea?]

Yes, the only way to kill them is to smash their brains....props to Shaun for new creative ways to smash brains...

Sheesh.

Make a damn zombie movie with self aware people who have seen a zombie movie. that would be scary.