remember vera wang?
i'm considering a project where i take the lyrics from the wall and reinterpret the lyrics using whatever tickles my fancy.
my guess is most of the jokes will be far too inside to realize humor, but for some.....they might get hit and take first. they'll be pitched fast! oooooh, stingey.
20051220
20051209
20051207
virtual frosty
so maybe you know i worked at an ad agency...it was good times, bad job, good people. i left that job to go back to school.
anyway, i keep in touch with a mess of em, and they got this little funness out now.
You put the head, torso and legs together and make combos. sometimes they dance. my fave (so far) is the leather snow daddy. Head is found 1 page down, on the left, in the middle; torso and legs are the same, respectively.
anyway, i keep in touch with a mess of em, and they got this little funness out now.
You put the head, torso and legs together and make combos. sometimes they dance. my fave (so far) is the leather snow daddy. Head is found 1 page down, on the left, in the middle; torso and legs are the same, respectively.
20051202
20051128
India [Hiatus]
I got back from India today with the dr.
An excellent adventure, complete with stomach woes.
Tales of Orchha Foot, Western Shit Road, Jahnsi (both the new imaginary {for now} camel and the filthiest train station i have ever witnessed), Mansenor Ass, Taj Mahal [biggest mausoleum ever!], delhi belly, old delhi (a whole street dedicated to paper! or an entire street of silver merchants! or spices!), the largest mosque in the world (so i'm told), and enough forts and palaces to make solomon blush.
and for Uncle Anus these are all random ponderings, musings, and tales of my trip. hot pics to come later!
but i gotta sleep and get these pics off my disk(s). J of JnJ, I'm gonna have some good entries for your 41st year contest....and study for finals.
i almost just posted "I'll be back" but I decided to spare you. and me, really.
An excellent adventure, complete with stomach woes.
Tales of Orchha Foot, Western Shit Road, Jahnsi (both the new imaginary {for now} camel and the filthiest train station i have ever witnessed), Mansenor Ass, Taj Mahal [biggest mausoleum ever!], delhi belly, old delhi (a whole street dedicated to paper! or an entire street of silver merchants! or spices!), the largest mosque in the world (so i'm told), and enough forts and palaces to make solomon blush.
and for Uncle Anus these are all random ponderings, musings, and tales of my trip. hot pics to come later!
but i gotta sleep and get these pics off my disk(s). J of JnJ, I'm gonna have some good entries for your 41st year contest....and study for finals.
i almost just posted "I'll be back" but I decided to spare you. and me, really.
20051111
it's only a model
Leanna Ortiz writes:
Take just a candy and become ready for 36 hours of love
Who can pass up an offer like that?
Take just a candy and become ready for 36 hours of love
Who can pass up an offer like that?
20051109
20051107
a few jems
20051031
daily harm
The man sat at the bar. He was not waiting for anyone, no one was waiting for him. The bartender asked him no questions, the only thing the man asked for all night was matches for his cigars, and his particular poison, cranberry and vodka.
The drink was funny to the man; he, as a younger man, repeatedly swore that he would never drink a cranberry and vodka, his reason being that if he had ever had it, he would like it too much and drink too much, causing unwanted regurgitation. That reasoning was left over from his college days when his drinking had been much heavier, not that he didn’t like to drink now, but it was a different kind of drinking. His reason being that he liked cranberry juice too much, he actually used it as a hangover relief – cold, crisp and full of vitamin C. so he figured that if he drank too much of it, the mere idea of cranberry juice might nauseate him.
But, like so many of his personal rules, he broke his promise to himself, and, like he figured, he loved it. But he had yet to drink too much of it, and the cigars were lovely. So he drank, and smoked, and drank and smoked, and thought of increasingly sillier things.
Things like the idea he had for a short story, a story of gross misunderstanding, a story about a society that fears change, and throughout the whole story the inhabitants of this civilization are all scared to let on that although this is this overwhelming fear of change, they all secretly loved change. They all secretly craved change, and the big payoff of the story was that all this hidden change bursts loose upon the streets directly after a gigantic earthquake. He hadn’t quite figured out what happened to the culture after the change pours forth into the streets, but he knew it was the downfall of that society. He wanted to work into the story: them rebuilding a society where they openly love change and now the inhabitants all despise those little paper coin rollers. A time of change, perhaps, is the title?
Of course, this story is much m ore amusing to a man who is making it up, and consuming cran n’ voddies and smoking hearty Cuban seed cigars.
The drink was funny to the man; he, as a younger man, repeatedly swore that he would never drink a cranberry and vodka, his reason being that if he had ever had it, he would like it too much and drink too much, causing unwanted regurgitation. That reasoning was left over from his college days when his drinking had been much heavier, not that he didn’t like to drink now, but it was a different kind of drinking. His reason being that he liked cranberry juice too much, he actually used it as a hangover relief – cold, crisp and full of vitamin C. so he figured that if he drank too much of it, the mere idea of cranberry juice might nauseate him.
But, like so many of his personal rules, he broke his promise to himself, and, like he figured, he loved it. But he had yet to drink too much of it, and the cigars were lovely. So he drank, and smoked, and drank and smoked, and thought of increasingly sillier things.
Things like the idea he had for a short story, a story of gross misunderstanding, a story about a society that fears change, and throughout the whole story the inhabitants of this civilization are all scared to let on that although this is this overwhelming fear of change, they all secretly loved change. They all secretly craved change, and the big payoff of the story was that all this hidden change bursts loose upon the streets directly after a gigantic earthquake. He hadn’t quite figured out what happened to the culture after the change pours forth into the streets, but he knew it was the downfall of that society. He wanted to work into the story: them rebuilding a society where they openly love change and now the inhabitants all despise those little paper coin rollers. A time of change, perhaps, is the title?
Of course, this story is much m ore amusing to a man who is making it up, and consuming cran n’ voddies and smoking hearty Cuban seed cigars.
20051028
chupple mcspam
and now for some brilliant spam, if only it was all like this:
hospital lonely lost affect sight. line understand story has hurry argue wished your progress three. sad appeared allow over books longer surprise, anybody sugar passed work front dinner! duty hear progress thankyou lord,
planning instead sent force at studying, fasten laid season in dead
separate development food, best fine leaving surely commit buy knows
poison middle" drink planning example allowed acquaint recommend them exactly small wont" regular secretary college height. knowledge expected whatever studying company woman giving perform interesting.
moon wanted recess grammar interest tongue. for suddenly blow than. sitting forest difficult grow, handsome nature lesson gotten! whose again now wrong sound, deep exclaimed chapter husband mentioned!
telling trust may occurrence countenance first college gone luckily work" win break yours above boys,
i love you.
20051021
chupple mcswing (part III)
Three minutes later, three men, in suits, walked into the bar. They were hit men. The man that they were looking for was sitting at the bar, in front of an empty glass. The bartender looked at the hit men entering and muscled, in a grunt, toward his only patron, “That’s it McSwing, you’re done”.
McSwing looked in the mirror behind the bar and analyzed the three poppers. Then he fell off his stool, feigning a drunken stupor, and groped around on the floor for a while, while the three men grinned at each other.
None of the three killers saw it coming. The bartender had heard about it, but that night he saw it. While on the floor, sliding his way through the spilt beer, cigar ash and empty packs of cigarettes, McSwing removed the skin from his right arm. “It wasn’t really an arm, after all!” the bartender would tell his boss, Jack, later. It was an extremely modified sawed-off ten-gauge shotgun. McSwing racked the weapon, and slammed it home.
McSwing looked in the mirror behind the bar and analyzed the three poppers. Then he fell off his stool, feigning a drunken stupor, and groped around on the floor for a while, while the three men grinned at each other.
None of the three killers saw it coming. The bartender had heard about it, but that night he saw it. While on the floor, sliding his way through the spilt beer, cigar ash and empty packs of cigarettes, McSwing removed the skin from his right arm. “It wasn’t really an arm, after all!” the bartender would tell his boss, Jack, later. It was an extremely modified sawed-off ten-gauge shotgun. McSwing racked the weapon, and slammed it home.
The last thing that the biggest man heard was the dreaded “chick-chook” of the round being chambered. Then the roar. The other two took heavy damage from the initial blast. One, named Chuck, understood what was happening as soon as he saw the big man go down. Chuck reached for his piece, a trusty Desert Eagle .45, which always reminded him of his father, Java Joe. But Chuck’s attempt to reach for his weapon was interrupted by a sudden realization that Chuck’s right arm no longer existed. Chuck knew that was bad news for him, and he also knew what was next, him. He was right on the former, but slightly incorrect on the latter, if only for a moment, and during that moment before the third roar from the surprise cannon, Chuck thought of his father. He remembered seeing his father in the hospital, on his deathbed, dying of stomach cancer.
20051020
If this is a dream, i'm glad you're having it with me.
Someday, When we are all dead
Someday,
When we are all dead
We’ll think back to the thoughts
And the ant, or the mutant spaceship
Can equally experience the doubts
The significance of being naked.
Which all should know
Has been forgotten
Inside our heads.
Replaced, most effectively with toxins
Mostly shit we made to perfection.
The truth of our moments
The experience of our orgasm
How are you doin this mornin?
[{(Fuck)}]
20051017
chupple this.
Tape, Mind, Smell, Scrambled &
Of dances, and towers, and time on tape
Of catchy little numbers, so tiny you can’t see
Of insidious little creatures screaming inside of your mind.
But this is no video
This.
Your catchy jazz numbers.
Your sweet luscious sweat smell.
Why the romance of these little people
Of which it’s so scrambled.
At least there is something
I HEAR THEM MUMBLE
20051014
chuppling poet
Inches or Miles
We missed you that first time by inches or miles.
We’ll never know.
We are unable to contact you.
Please call immediately.
Our actions can be unnerving.
Our attitudes shock many.
We make it slow.
We’ll take your items.
We thought you were ideal.
Your experience has flown free, inside our soul.
We are scarred, and scared, but heal with your inches and miles.
Come on up to the house.
We missed you that first time by inches or miles.
We’ll never know.
We are unable to contact you.
Please call immediately.
Our actions can be unnerving.
Our attitudes shock many.
We make it slow.
We’ll take your items.
We thought you were ideal.
Your experience has flown free, inside our soul.
We are scarred, and scared, but heal with your inches and miles.
Come on up to the house.
20051013
mystery shopping
so i got a mystery shop today.
i can't decide if it is completely against my morals or not.
mystery shopping, on the one hand, tis cool - i get to check out places i normally wouldn't go, and usually to places i haven't been before (Daly City [Daily - Shitty], for instance, today). It's also interesting to know which companies like to have this done. Tells you they are expecting a certain standard for their employees. I think I like that.
But (he bolded) the majority of the shops are not used to make sure that shoppers are getting excellent service at their local pizza joint. The majority are designed to reward (or punish) the employees at the local pizza joint, or movie theater, or amusement park, where the customer is to be UPSOLD. "Ok, sir, that's a pepperoni pizza slice, and small coke and a churro. Would you like to upsize that coke to a large? [does anyone remember the slogan that burker king [or was it mcdonalds?] used to make the meal sides (fries, rings, the drink) Ginormous, "GO LARGE!" {america follows - "Make me fat!" they screamed.
})
ok, sidebar over, anyway, so I'm having a hard time with it.
IN fact, I wrote this post in draft on August 23. I've since quit since then, for a variety of reasons (hate it, they don't pay enough for the trouble, they pay slow, not to mention the moral annoyance).
i can't decide if it is completely against my morals or not.
mystery shopping, on the one hand, tis cool - i get to check out places i normally wouldn't go, and usually to places i haven't been before (Daly City [Daily - Shitty], for instance, today). It's also interesting to know which companies like to have this done. Tells you they are expecting a certain standard for their employees. I think I like that.
But (he bolded) the majority of the shops are not used to make sure that shoppers are getting excellent service at their local pizza joint. The majority are designed to reward (or punish) the employees at the local pizza joint, or movie theater, or amusement park, where the customer is to be UPSOLD. "Ok, sir, that's a pepperoni pizza slice, and small coke and a churro. Would you like to upsize that coke to a large? [does anyone remember the slogan that burker king [or was it mcdonalds?] used to make the meal sides (fries, rings, the drink) Ginormous, "GO LARGE!" {america follows - "Make me fat!" they screamed.
})ok, sidebar over, anyway, so I'm having a hard time with it.
IN fact, I wrote this post in draft on August 23. I've since quit since then, for a variety of reasons (hate it, they don't pay enough for the trouble, they pay slow, not to mention the moral annoyance).
20050930
i mean damn
luther wright.
what a guy.
he's got this band, 'the wrongs'.
yeah, luther wright and the wrongs. they are the the guys that did the improbable. here's a review -
"Luther Wright and the Wrongs pull off the improbable. Where the original floated on some distant, emotionally wrought plain, the Wrongs rump and whump, making you want to grab your girl and two-step. Far from sounding nostalgic, the music feels urgent."- New York Times June 30, 2002
so they did that. and i was, you know, googling the guy to see what else was out there, as you do.
currently there is this song that i can't seem to hear enough of. It's called 'hurtin fer certain'. on the album of the same name.
i got this download from his website, but as of now, (java is cooler) that appears to be crashed out.
point is, the song just bounces gleefully, with lyrics like:
'all the words that we said, lie stone cold somewhere defeated...
i sleep a-lone, and all i ever dream of, is a farm and a field of green bud'
so i ordered the damn thing. can't much remember what music i bought last, full price. damn thing has gotta come from canadia so i get in 3 weeks or so.
what a guy.
he's got this band, 'the wrongs'.
yeah, luther wright and the wrongs. they are the the guys that did the improbable. here's a review -
"Luther Wright and the Wrongs pull off the improbable. Where the original floated on some distant, emotionally wrought plain, the Wrongs rump and whump, making you want to grab your girl and two-step. Far from sounding nostalgic, the music feels urgent."- New York Times June 30, 2002
so they did that. and i was, you know, googling the guy to see what else was out there, as you do.
currently there is this song that i can't seem to hear enough of. It's called 'hurtin fer certain'. on the album of the same name.
i got this download from his website, but as of now, (java is cooler) that appears to be crashed out.
point is, the song just bounces gleefully, with lyrics like:
'all the words that we said, lie stone cold somewhere defeated...
i sleep a-lone, and all i ever dream of, is a farm and a field of green bud'
so i ordered the damn thing. can't much remember what music i bought last, full price. damn thing has gotta come from canadia so i get in 3 weeks or so.
20050923
20050921
Grover, don't lose faith!
I got two tickets from DPT today, just now.
8/10 & 8/17.
2400 block of laguna st, pac heights!
with that bad clutch! wow, i am impressed with that thief!
going to check it out (teh area) shortly.
so much for DPT communicating to the SFPD and vice versa.
what do i do if it's found? sheesh!
more news soon!
[what the hell am i talking about? - this this & this]
8/10 & 8/17.
2400 block of laguna st, pac heights!
with that bad clutch! wow, i am impressed with that thief!
going to check it out (teh area) shortly.
so much for DPT communicating to the SFPD and vice versa.
what do i do if it's found? sheesh!
more news soon!
[what the hell am i talking about? - this this & this]
20050919
haiku chupple
so i was thinking, man, i sure am disappointed by the federal govt these days. and state government doesn't seem to be any better. city govt seems to be ok, but still something to be desired.
so what does this all mean? jaded as i am by both the RNC and DNC, realizing that 3rd parties have little chance of defeating the two giant parties and their masses of wealth, what is one to do?
Go to the movies. This 'taking back' is just the type of activity that brings about change. Elevating people to the point of things and just 'gettin ur done' charms me. It's exciting, and fun. and i haven't been to one of these drive-ins, yet. gotta go. how are we getting there? Surely, not in my car. That status hasn't changed.
Be well, you good people of earth. i gotta do some homework.
the chuppler.
so what does this all mean? jaded as i am by both the RNC and DNC, realizing that 3rd parties have little chance of defeating the two giant parties and their masses of wealth, what is one to do?
Go to the movies. This 'taking back' is just the type of activity that brings about change. Elevating people to the point of things and just 'gettin ur done' charms me. It's exciting, and fun. and i haven't been to one of these drive-ins, yet. gotta go. how are we getting there? Surely, not in my car. That status hasn't changed.
Be well, you good people of earth. i gotta do some homework.
the chuppler.
20050909
20050908
20050907
20050827
need fortune. have booze.
| You Are a Martini |
 There's no other way to say it: you're a total lush. You hold your liquor well, and you hold a lot of it! |
fish judging ocean
you ever flown to Dulles International Airport (IAD)? it's a big weird airport outside Washington D.C.
It is this older (1962) airport that is trying to deal with strange new security protocols, and being an airport in the nation's capital, there is a lot of air traffic and whatnot. It also is sorta out there (Virginia). Reagan Intl is also in the area, mucho air traffic there.
So Dulles is the hub airport of Independence airlines, and i recently flew through Dulles to get to Alan & AK47's weddin in Howell, MI. Which is just outside Detroit. Howell, you may care to know, has the Melon Festival. It was going on the weekend of Alan and Ak47's weddin. The plan was to fly in to Detroit, get a rental car, drive to Howl (that's how i say it, so let's type it thataway) meet up at the beer tent good plan i thought.
So now you got the background.
It is this older (1962) airport that is trying to deal with strange new security protocols, and being an airport in the nation's capital, there is a lot of air traffic and whatnot. It also is sorta out there (Virginia). Reagan Intl is also in the area, mucho air traffic there.
So Dulles is the hub airport of Independence airlines, and i recently flew through Dulles to get to Alan & AK47's weddin in Howell, MI. Which is just outside Detroit. Howell, you may care to know, has the Melon Festival. It was going on the weekend of Alan and Ak47's weddin. The plan was to fly in to Detroit, get a rental car, drive to Howl (that's how i say it, so let's type it thataway) meet up at the beer tent good plan i thought.
So now you got the background.
20050824
car is still gone!
As you can clearly see here, my car has not been returned.
As you can see upon closer inspection, yes, it hasn't been miniaturized, borrowed without asking (glue! I need glue!), or some other thing.
Still gone.
Gone, Gone, Goner.
oh yeah, the streetcleaner hasn't come by, either.
As you can see upon closer inspection, yes, it hasn't been miniaturized, borrowed without asking (glue! I need glue!), or some other thing.
Still gone.
Gone, Gone, Goner.
oh yeah, the streetcleaner hasn't come by, either.
20050822
got tag
List ten songs that you are currently digging ... it doesn't matter what genre they are from, whether they have words, or even if they're no good, but they must be songs you're really enjoying right now. Post these instructions, the artists, and the ten songs in your ____.
Time is running out - muse
(anything from) 'rebuild the wall' - luther wright and the wrongs
glass, concrete and stone - david byrne
city on the hill - fire wrecks the forest
amitriptyline - john vanderslice
the roses you grew - the larval organs
i miss the war - mk ultra
people ain't no good - nick cave
dress sexy at my funeral - smog
don't slander me - the sound of urchin
no tags. have a great day. and no, i wasn't listening to any of this in 1993.
oh yeah,
she sells sanctuary - the cult just popped on my itunes. honorable mention.
Time is running out - muse
(anything from) 'rebuild the wall' - luther wright and the wrongs
glass, concrete and stone - david byrne
city on the hill - fire wrecks the forest
amitriptyline - john vanderslice
the roses you grew - the larval organs
i miss the war - mk ultra
people ain't no good - nick cave
dress sexy at my funeral - smog
don't slander me - the sound of urchin
no tags. have a great day. and no, i wasn't listening to any of this in 1993.
oh yeah,
she sells sanctuary - the cult just popped on my itunes. honorable mention.
20050818
catching up
some people i know are talking about this and it is indeed funny.
one of my faves:
In the beginning... He created a mountain, trees, and a midget.
p.s. - oh yeah, this. is the term counterpoint? sheeit.
p.p.s. - also favorite! -
WHY YOU SHOULD CONVERT TO FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTERISM
Flimsy moral standards.
Every friday is a relgious holiday. If your work/school objects to that, demand your religious beliefs are respected and threaten to call the ACLU.
Our heaven is WAY better. We've got a Stripper Factory AND a Beer Volcano.
one of my faves:
In the beginning... He created a mountain, trees, and a midget.
p.s. - oh yeah, this. is the term counterpoint? sheeit.
p.p.s. - also favorite! -
WHY YOU SHOULD CONVERT TO FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTERISM
Flimsy moral standards.
Every friday is a relgious holiday. If your work/school objects to that, demand your religious beliefs are respected and threaten to call the ACLU.
Our heaven is WAY better. We've got a Stripper Factory AND a Beer Volcano.
transportation hell*
here's what my day sounds like today;
beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.
"Hi, I'm looking for a part, and I've got the Part Number, yeah I can hold....
Yeah, I know it's discontinued, but I'm looking for one anyway. You don't have one then? Ok, thanks!
beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.
Hi, I'm looking for a part, and I've ...."
Cycle, and repeat.
You see, my motorcycle got knocked the fook over the other night, and someone thought enough to pick it up, and not enough to leave a note. damn them.
So the damage that I have would have been prevented by this handy bolt-on addition.
But no.
So here:
google find me here!
99950-70104
mucho thanks
an old friend of my brother's (B) had this lexicon database on his website before the interweb blew open. It was full of amusing definitions, and actually had (has) this listed:
*personal hell -
When everything seems to be working against you, you are in a personal hell. Significant others will turn bitchy, jobs will become shitty, school will become overbearing, you'll get ticketed, and all manner of evil begins stacking up at a geometric rate. No one person can be targeted as the source and no one else can share in your torture. On the good side, once you realize that you are in a personal hell they seem to dissolve.
so my *transportation hell is not as majestically mind-blowing as this, as I'm mostly in a vehicular hell. I'm secretly hoping (can I be secretly posting a hope?) that by discussing this said "v.hell" that I will disengage the primordial evil spells and spirits which have lately been manifesting in my automotive house. Think it will work?
beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.
"Hi, I'm looking for a part, and I've got the Part Number, yeah I can hold....
Yeah, I know it's discontinued, but I'm looking for one anyway. You don't have one then? Ok, thanks!
beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.
Hi, I'm looking for a part, and I've ...."
Cycle, and repeat.
You see, my motorcycle got knocked the fook over the other night, and someone thought enough to pick it up, and not enough to leave a note. damn them.
So the damage that I have would have been prevented by this handy bolt-on addition.
But no.
So here:
google find me here!
99950-70104
mucho thanks
an old friend of my brother's (B) had this lexicon database on his website before the interweb blew open. It was full of amusing definitions, and actually had (has) this listed:
*personal hell -
When everything seems to be working against you, you are in a personal hell. Significant others will turn bitchy, jobs will become shitty, school will become overbearing, you'll get ticketed, and all manner of evil begins stacking up at a geometric rate. No one person can be targeted as the source and no one else can share in your torture. On the good side, once you realize that you are in a personal hell they seem to dissolve.
so my *transportation hell is not as majestically mind-blowing as this, as I'm mostly in a vehicular hell. I'm secretly hoping (can I be secretly posting a hope?) that by discussing this said "v.hell" that I will disengage the primordial evil spells and spirits which have lately been manifesting in my automotive house. Think it will work?
20050812
car update
there is no car update.
still gone.
by now, every thief has gone through and removed all things i ever liked and left in the car. we, here at the daily chuppler, are thinking of starting up a pool on when the car might be found. Thinking $1 per 6 hour period in a day. Winner gets 75% of all proceeds. Closest person, that is. and ties are settled by a rochambeau.
in you are interested...post you wager in the comments following this post only.
i got aug 18, 12pm - 6pm. also, the 8/29 12p-6p.
a funnyism found when exploring the webbery -
"My dad used to tell me that Robert Englund was a nice man under that make up. That won't stop him from killing me in my sleep, Dad."
This just in - all future rochambeau (rock, paper, scissors) duels shall now be as follows:
A similar game called hunter, shotgun and tiger uses more exaggerated gestures. The players turn away from each other. On the count of 3, the players both turn around towards each other showing one of the three gestures. An aiming gesture is the shotgun. A roar with two raised craws is the tiger. No gesture is the hunter. Since the gesture requires big movements, it is more appropriate then Stone Paper Scissors when there is an audience watching from a distance. It is funny to watch the cheaters trying to change a gesture at the last minute. Hunter wins shotgun; shotgun wins tiger; tiger wins hunter.
Thank the Jeebus for wikipedia!
and, of course, this: I just don't know how we've ever lived without it. seriously.
still gone.
by now, every thief has gone through and removed all things i ever liked and left in the car. we, here at the daily chuppler, are thinking of starting up a pool on when the car might be found. Thinking $1 per 6 hour period in a day. Winner gets 75% of all proceeds. Closest person, that is. and ties are settled by a rochambeau.
in you are interested...post you wager in the comments following this post only.
i got aug 18, 12pm - 6pm. also, the 8/29 12p-6p.
a funnyism found when exploring the webbery -
"My dad used to tell me that Robert Englund was a nice man under that make up. That won't stop him from killing me in my sleep, Dad."
This just in - all future rochambeau (rock, paper, scissors) duels shall now be as follows:
A similar game called hunter, shotgun and tiger uses more exaggerated gestures. The players turn away from each other. On the count of 3, the players both turn around towards each other showing one of the three gestures. An aiming gesture is the shotgun. A roar with two raised craws is the tiger. No gesture is the hunter. Since the gesture requires big movements, it is more appropriate then Stone Paper Scissors when there is an audience watching from a distance. It is funny to watch the cheaters trying to change a gesture at the last minute. Hunter wins shotgun; shotgun wins tiger; tiger wins hunter.
Thank the Jeebus for wikipedia!
and, of course, this: I just don't know how we've ever lived without it. seriously.
20050810
bevan
So i emailed Gavin Newsom and Bevan Dufty in regards to my stolen car. I thought that maybe by contacting my local government authorities (Gav's the mayor, Bevan my supervisor) they could, how you say, expedite the process of finding my stolen car.
Bevan actually wrote me back, and cc'd 7 of his friends/associates/colleagues in the SFPD and the SF DPT. I am very impressed with his response. His email spoke of each of the people cc'd, how he knew them, what their role is in local govt, and their phone number.
I have received phone calls from a police officer each day since then, apprising me of the situation (car not found) and what they are trying to do to find it. Hell, even if its all bluff and they aren't doing anything, it feels better to have someone contacting you about it. L's car was stolen, and her friend found it 3 days later, before the police even had put it into the system. I'm impressed with Bevan's help.
Sidebar: I took a course on the history of the American City last semester. Learning about bosses, their reform, and finally good govt (goo-goo) I suppose influenced me in contacting Bevan. I think there isn't enough of this kind of communication between govt and the people. It's refreshing. I heart SF, even though my car was stolen.
I'm now resigned to waiting for either a friend or the police to contact me alerting me that my car has been located. That's really the thing that happens. DPT finds it, after the thief is finished with it (out of gas) and it's been parked somewhere where it's about to get a ticket. Computer tells the DPT peep that it's stolen, DPT contacts Police, Police contact me. I get about 20 minutes to get to my car before it's towed to the yard. Either that, or it's being chopped for parts.
Updates to continue. Go Bevan. Got my vote.
Bevan actually wrote me back, and cc'd 7 of his friends/associates/colleagues in the SFPD and the SF DPT. I am very impressed with his response. His email spoke of each of the people cc'd, how he knew them, what their role is in local govt, and their phone number.
I have received phone calls from a police officer each day since then, apprising me of the situation (car not found) and what they are trying to do to find it. Hell, even if its all bluff and they aren't doing anything, it feels better to have someone contacting you about it. L's car was stolen, and her friend found it 3 days later, before the police even had put it into the system. I'm impressed with Bevan's help.
Sidebar: I took a course on the history of the American City last semester. Learning about bosses, their reform, and finally good govt (goo-goo) I suppose influenced me in contacting Bevan. I think there isn't enough of this kind of communication between govt and the people. It's refreshing. I heart SF, even though my car was stolen.
I'm now resigned to waiting for either a friend or the police to contact me alerting me that my car has been located. That's really the thing that happens. DPT finds it, after the thief is finished with it (out of gas) and it's been parked somewhere where it's about to get a ticket. Computer tells the DPT peep that it's stolen, DPT contacts Police, Police contact me. I get about 20 minutes to get to my car before it's towed to the yard. Either that, or it's being chopped for parts.
Updates to continue. Go Bevan. Got my vote.
20050809
lookin
cuz L's car was found so close, I thought I'd take a look see around Hayes valley. Her car was taken a block or so from where mine was, maybe the same person took it to the same place....right?
So I'm driving around Hayes Valley with my roommate S (her car), and didn't find it. the whole time i'm looking i'm wondering what, if anything, starting to look for my car in the ghetto says.
Hurts my head.
p.s. - car still gone. no luck in bayview either.
So I'm driving around Hayes Valley with my roommate S (her car), and didn't find it. the whole time i'm looking i'm wondering what, if anything, starting to look for my car in the ghetto says.
Hurts my head.
p.s. - car still gone. no luck in bayview either.
20050808
Car
Now my car has been stolen.
Seen it?
Blue Saturn, 1994.
License 3 FED 727
I wasn't even driving it, just moving it across the street, back and forth (street cleaning), because it has this bad clutch. So if you are in my neighborhood, or close, give a look out. Pretty sure it didn't get far. I'll be chronicling this event. Stoopid, stoopid thief.
Yippee.
20050804
I love to push the Spamalot!
Well, I haven't seen this one yet...
Have I told you of my love/hate for Spam? The meat, and the interweb varities. What the hell is going on in that picture?
millar larry
Some money in various currencies were discovered concealed in barrels with piles of weapons and ammunitions at a location near one of Saddam’s old palaces during a rescue operation several months ago, and it was agreed by the few of us present that the money be shared amongst us, this was an illegal thing to do though, but I tell you what? no compensation can make up for the risks we are taking with our lives in this hell hole.
Larry Millar
So. Three things...
1) I love the fiction. This is great fiction. It's got action, adventure, a potential love interest, intrigue, moral dilemnas, compassion, greed. MAN!
2) I request you ping the crap outta Larry Millar at his hotmail address. I'm gonna check in, and see if I get "phished".
3) Nigeria scams have gotten nicely developed! How many peeps you think will go for this one?
20050803
20050802
code
walking on market this morning...and i heard this guy in a suit say into his cell phone,
"Tell Danny we're not selling Denny's till Aladdin hits". Besides that being a completely bizarre statement with all it's own hoorah, I'm just touched by the whole thing.
Had me reeling for two blocks, and I never even got a good look at the suit!
Hell, maybe it's just cuz i'm 30 today.
this tonight.
hey buddy, can you lend me Rs 2.5 crore?
"Tell Danny we're not selling Denny's till Aladdin hits". Besides that being a completely bizarre statement with all it's own hoorah, I'm just touched by the whole thing.
Had me reeling for two blocks, and I never even got a good look at the suit!
Hell, maybe it's just cuz i'm 30 today.
this tonight.
hey buddy, can you lend me Rs 2.5 crore?
20050801
on the subject of zombies
Why is there no, shall I call it, 'common knowledge' when it comes to character's portrayed in zombie movies?
'Oh my GOD? They're bitey!!!!' So frustrating. Haven't you ever seen a damn zombie movie? Huh? Yes, it transfers to you if you are bitten. No, you can't get rid of it...[altho, I do like The Evil Dead's way out of possession/evil/badness/whichhaveyou, lopping!!! I haven't seen that yet, zombie bites your arm, you lop it off! would it work? is this a cross genre idea?]
Yes, the only way to kill them is to smash their brains....props to Shaun for new creative ways to smash brains...
Sheesh.
Make a damn zombie movie with self aware people who have seen a zombie movie. that would be scary.
20050729
20050727
20050725
just guess
lookie who it is!
guesses as to what she did?
The supersuckers say - 'Your mom RULES!'
The coolest mom ever!
GOLDEN, Colo. - A woman who told police she wanted to be a "cool mom" pleaded guilty to sexual assault charges Monday for having sex with high school boys at parties where authorities said she supplied drugs and alcohol.
Silvia Johnson, 40, pleaded guilty to two misdemeanor counts of sexual assault and nine felony counts of contributing to the delinquency of a minor. As part of a plea agreement, prosecutors dropped two counts of distribution of methamphetamine.
"She described herself as a `cool mom,'" Detective R.J. Vander Veen wrote in the affidavit. He said Johnson told investigators "she was never popular with classmates in high school and now began `feeling like one of the group.'"
Prosecutors did not recommend a sentence, but each sexual assault count carries up to four years in prison, and each count of contributing to the delinquency of a minor carries up to nine years, district attorney's spokeswoman Pam Russell said.
Johnson, who is free on bail, held parties for the boys almost weekly between October 2003 and October 2004, authorities said. She was accused of providing drugs and alcohol to eight boys and having sex with five of them.
Police said the investigation began after one of the boys told his mother about the encounters, and she reported it to authorities.
Who the hell wants to go back to high school? Jeezie-Chreezie! Man. Speaking of hell and christ and anti-christ (work with me here), it seems that these here kids are just plum silly:
PALERMO, Italy (Reuters) - An Italian couple stole 50,000 euros from a woman in the Sicilian city of Palermo after convincing her they were vampires who would impregnate her with the son of the Anti- Christ if she did not pay them.
The man, a cabaret singer, and his girlfriend took the money from their victim over four years by selling her pills at 3,000 euros each that they said would abort the Anti-Christ's son.
Police uncovered the fraud after the 47-year-old woman's family became concerned when they discovered she had spent all her savings, local news agencies AGI and ANSA reported.
That's funny for a ton of reasons, especially because it seems inspired by this mediocre movie...only saved by visions of hell and the generally entertaining catholic bashing and religious iconery! Woah!
p.s. - if you went there i'm - Bulbo Bracegirdle of Hardbottle & Elrond Súrion. occassionally i'll irritate even myself with this type of dore-kee-ness. i mean the hobbitts-es, not the fair! scroll down for the vol opps!
more spamfilter!
classics....
Christian singles. A match made in heaven.
When you see bodice ripper related to philosopher, it means that tea party living with chestnut goes to sleep.
But they need to remember how knowingly pine cone over wakes up.
Blush carefree betrayal subjectivity klaxon
Influential culprit Methuen chevron complete
Rock hard in twenty minutes.
Rock her all night long.
Christian singles. A match made in heaven.
When you see bodice ripper related to philosopher, it means that tea party living with chestnut goes to sleep.
But they need to remember how knowingly pine cone over wakes up.
Blush carefree betrayal subjectivity klaxon
Influential culprit Methuen chevron complete
Rock hard in twenty minutes.
Rock her all night long.
20050722
drunk
tonight.
hiccups to beat the band.
went to swig's 1st anniversary.
was a hoot!
like it when people get excited and actually dress up!
anyway, photo's posted if i ever see them!
must go to sleep. the drink might have had it's way with me! and i don't know what this is1111
THEY LOOK LIKE ONE'S RIGHT?
happy july 22nd!
wanna go to a party sat night? should be fun! in nOE.
hiccups to beat the band.
went to swig's 1st anniversary.
was a hoot!
like it when people get excited and actually dress up!
anyway, photo's posted if i ever see them!
must go to sleep. the drink might have had it's way with me! and i don't know what this is1111
THEY LOOK LIKE ONE'S RIGHT?
happy july 22nd!
wanna go to a party sat night? should be fun! in nOE.
20050721
20050720
new bar
so my friends opened a new bar called johncolins.
it's those nice guys from Wish from behind the bar there, got their own joint. A nice space, and it's in a neighborhood that could use a little bit more nice. 90 Natoma. just off 2nd, near that E Rickenbacker's place with all the motorcycles.. check it out. Nice 2 buck happy hour for beer. mmmm, beer.
it's those nice guys from Wish from behind the bar there, got their own joint. A nice space, and it's in a neighborhood that could use a little bit more nice. 90 Natoma. just off 2nd, near that E Rickenbacker's place with all the motorcycles.. check it out. Nice 2 buck happy hour for beer. mmmm, beer.
20050719
viva
went to vegas...
gambled, drank, ate, exercised my right to arm bears (photo to come back with the L). All things America (fuck yeah!) and A-Mare-I-Cuhn.
Las Vegas.
Damn, was it hot.
Decided to go to the store to pick up supplies (read: beer) for the fridge in the hotel room.
Found out from the not so helpful desk clerk that there was a quickie-mart was on the corner, but a VONS was three blocks down.
A more attractive selection was awaiting us there, we supposed. Got to the Slushie emporium, decided that wasn't going to do, and got about 1000 feet down the street to the supposed VONS when we both realized the shear impossibility of continuing the journey.
It was hard to breathe.
Had been out walking for maybe 10 minutes. Hot wind at our backs meant a hot wind in our face on the way back.
Having no sign of VONS. walked back to the quickie mart, with hot wind in our faces, and just about melted into the store from the door. AH, Air Conditioning. After taking a ten minute or so refuge there (periodically opening and standing in the doors of the refrigerated section), we headed back the ¾ block back to the hotel.
Later, in consultancy with others about the journey, discovered that it was 116 degrees Farenheit during our death march.
that's hot. that's 'oh i killed my dog by leaving him in the car' hot. Sheeit.
Relax! Eventually, we got beer. Thanks for your concern, tho!
Best two Tshirts I saw all weekend were this and one that said "Gold Digger. Like a hooker...only smarter."
Rode the NY NY rolly coaster. Wasn’t drunk, like the previous time I rode it. Not a bad ride, but a little short for the $12.50 entry. Ouch.
Played a little video poker, drank a little beer, saw the MGM lions a few times.
Mostly hid from the outside.
Damn hot.
The pool was a good refuge. But once you got in, you couldn’t get out, the poolside concrete was boiling. Cook an egg. Shoulda tried that.
Went to the Wynn.
It’s the newest of the big casino’s on the strip. It’s aight. Fancy and all, and a nice touch by having more nature than most. But still a giant hotel with a big casino. Giant water fountains. What’s that logic? You got a desert city, and you surround these giant hotels with moats. Damn mall with a moat. Illusion? Silly! Pirates of the caribbean gone WRONG.
20050716
chilly wonker
So, i went to see the new Johnny Depp/Tim Burton creation Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, and I have to say that it's good.
Very clever, funny, modernized version of the classic(s).
I was very excited to see an updated version of the boat trip through the tunnel...and it was good.
Here's my problem. Why? Why is it necessary to make an updated version of an excellent movie with today's stars? We can go on and on and on about this idea of remakes, and it still won't change the fact that the original, in most cases, is better.
Don't get me wrong, this is a great version...but repetitous. A new ending (hooray!) [not a spoiler, but I always enjoyed Gene Wilder's nasty side in Willy, at the end] helps this version, and freshens it, but dang. i'm not sure what i wanted. Depp's great. I guess I wanted a new vision...and i got a revamp. guess i shoulda seen that coming.
Still see it. but i give it an 'ok to rent' thumbs up. doesn't need to be seen in the theater.
check out this link of Depp being interviewed about Charlie.
and is this proof of something?
Very clever, funny, modernized version of the classic(s).
I was very excited to see an updated version of the boat trip through the tunnel...and it was good.
Here's my problem. Why? Why is it necessary to make an updated version of an excellent movie with today's stars? We can go on and on and on about this idea of remakes, and it still won't change the fact that the original, in most cases, is better.
Don't get me wrong, this is a great version...but repetitous. A new ending (hooray!) [not a spoiler, but I always enjoyed Gene Wilder's nasty side in Willy, at the end] helps this version, and freshens it, but dang. i'm not sure what i wanted. Depp's great. I guess I wanted a new vision...and i got a revamp. guess i shoulda seen that coming.
Still see it. but i give it an 'ok to rent' thumbs up. doesn't need to be seen in the theater.
check out this link of Depp being interviewed about Charlie.
and is this proof of something?
Depp: Somebody sent me an article where Gene Wilder said, "Why would they remake Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory?" We didn’t remake "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory," we remade (the book) "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory." It’s based on the same book they based theirs on. Making a statement that they only made this film because of the money is a really odd statement to make from a guy who has been in the business as long as he has ... all movies were made because somebody somewhere wanted a return on their dollar that they spent. Ultimately it’s a business.
Final say: a great movie this would be if I hadn't seen it before. Gene Wilder (and his songs) rock this version.
20050714
picked up by my spam filter...AWESOME!
Thank you for e-mailing President Bush. Your ideas and comments are very
important to him.
Because of the large volume of e-mail received, the President cannot
personally respond to each message.
In addition to President@WhiteHouse.gov, we have developed White House Web
Mail, an automated e-mail response system. Please access
http://www.whitehouse.gov/webmail to submit comments on a specific issue.
Additionally, we welcome you to visit our website for the most up-to-date
information on current events and topics of interest to you.
20050713
and a good line
As President Bush said in October, "We are fighting these terrorists with our military in Afghanistan and Iraq and beyond so we do not have to face them in the streets of our own cities." Tragically, the terrible bombing in London shows we are now paying a horrible price for this silly, dangerous, short-sighted, and truly dishonest line of reasoning.
from Norm
from Norm
well...
| You Are 60% American |
 Though sometimes the good ole US of A makes you cringe Still, you know there's no place better suited to be your home. You love your freedom and no one's going to take it away from you! |
20050712
house of the dead!
It came in the mail.
All hail Netflix as the devil that it is.
I heart you, Netflix.
House of the dead, where/when? Still got the projector, kids?The sound has to be turned way UP! Finally T will know of the glory. And can stop bashing Boll. And this smallerdemon can know of the full joy of zombies with the quickness.
Anybody know of software clashes between itunes and Firefox? prolly just my crap processor. found this in my searchery, tho. note, tweak the settings to select itunes as your player. damn kids and their interwebbery!
All hail Netflix as the devil that it is.
I heart you, Netflix.
House of the dead, where/when? Still got the projector, kids?The sound has to be turned way UP! Finally T will know of the glory. And can stop bashing Boll. And this smallerdemon can know of the full joy of zombies with the quickness.
Anybody know of software clashes between itunes and Firefox? prolly just my crap processor. found this in my searchery, tho. note, tweak the settings to select itunes as your player. damn kids and their interwebbery!
20050706
now look here
online revolution, my ass.anyway, tryin to get my ass in gear about this damn website which i have supposedly been writing for, but getting the ball rolling has been the most excruciating. and the pay sucks, so that's not much help...tell you what.
This here MAY be the weirdest mod i seen yet. you be the judge.
enough!
This here MAY be the weirdest mod i seen yet. you be the judge.
enough!
20050613
trying
so i went on the ALC
it was long and dry, but cool. i guess it raised enough money to keep the agenciies it supports around for another year, and pulls them outta debt. a good thing, methinks.
before that was camping with my high school friends, BCT 05.
and camping before that on the weekend, feels like i haven't been home in a month. nice to be back in the city...
anyway, just testing out this whole blog thing, working out the kinks...
gots to get me a job!
it was long and dry, but cool. i guess it raised enough money to keep the agenciies it supports around for another year, and pulls them outta debt. a good thing, methinks.
before that was camping with my high school friends, BCT 05.
and camping before that on the weekend, feels like i haven't been home in a month. nice to be back in the city...
anyway, just testing out this whole blog thing, working out the kinks...
gots to get me a job!
20050526
the very first
obligatory bits -
can't believe people read this, blah
first posting, blah
i'm bored with this already.
can't believe people read this, blah
first posting, blah
i'm bored with this already.
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